I have an objective way of critiquing songs. For me, a good song is like a tripod. It has (at least) three solid supports. Lyrics, melody and structure. If quality lyrics aren't there, then it's not a good song. If solid structure is ignored or veered away from, it better be for an impressive reason. If the melody isn't good, regardless of lyric quality or production value, the song will sound boring and won't hold anyone's attention.
Now, this is a songwriting competition and with that comes a specific challenge. The challenge will be the forth (and most important) element to deciding a songs worthiness in this environment. If I find the challenge isn't met, the song will go right to the back of the line... regardless of how good the song is otherwise. It's also worth noting that, In my mind, this is a "songwriting" competition. It's not a "production" or "performance" competition. That means I will be setting aside production value as a deciding factor.
I will be breaking down each one of the previous explained elements and giving them a letter grade. For Example:
Challenge: A
Lyrics: B
Structure: C
Melody: B
This will help to group the songs into tiers. Once I have a the songs in order based on these "grades", any ties (or songs that appear equal by letter grade) will then be placed in order by other elements (production and/or performance) and decided upon by my personal preference. I will be listing the song's reviews in the order they appear on the album. The songs will appear at the bottom of the page by order of how I've ranked them. Any questions? Good. Let's begin.
A Song About Woodsetts - Danny Blackwell
Challenge: A - This song is clearly about a place and the lyrics tell us it's not just a town but a town he grew up in.
Lyrics: A - These are solid lyrics with some nice imagery.
Structure: A - Follows classic song structure. Would have liked to hear the chorus one more time but I can't really knock it for that.
Melody: A - Great melody that gets stuck in your instantly.
All in all, this is a great song. If heard this on the radio or stumbled over it somewhere I would probably hunt it down and learn more about the artist and his work. Great job Danny.
Oxford - Ben Walker
Challenge: A - This song is clearly about a place and the lyrics tell us it's not just a town but a town he hails from.
Lyrics: B - Lyrics are good. I only have some minor issues here.
Structure: B - There is technically nothing wrong with this structure... except for the departure at the end. (explanation to follow)
Melody: A - Great melody. No complaints here.
This song is really quite good. There are only two elements that don't work for me. The first are some subtle lyric issues. The chorus has the lyric "a spring attached to your back". Again, it's not "bad", just takes me out of the song a bit. I keep thinking that if it were "a pull-string attached to your back" it would have the intended effect while creating some more familiar imagery and would also give some more layers to work with. Perhaps I'm splitting hairs. The second (and much more troubling) element that I'm having issue with is the "Cheers" refrain at the end. It's not that referencing that song is a bad idea. I totally get it. It's that it's using a whole four bars and doing the song verbatim that kills it for me. Also, using this at end the song really gave me some trouble. It does two things. It makes me feel like it's not (completely) an original song and it also makes me forget the original melody, which is frustrating because it's such a good melody. If he had borrowed a phrase or a string of notes, or even went back to the original chorus to end the song, this wouldn't have been an issue at all for me. It's worth noting that if the song hadn't done such a heavy borrow from Cheers, It would have scored all A's.
Mount Holly - Austin Criswell
Challenge: B - While this song clearly states his home town, it's really about a long lost love.
Lyrics: B - Solid lyrics with some nice imagery.
Structure: B - Solid structure... but I would have like to hear a bridge.
Melody: A - Wonderful Melody. Very pleasant.
What can I say about this song? It's really nice. Made me smile the whole way through and gave me a nice nostalgic feeling. The only thing I'm missing is a bridge. All in all, really nice work.
The Pinpoint Accurate Telling Of The Origin Of Salem, OH - Inverse T. Clown
Challenge: B - This song is really about a character... but does get around to telling us about a town named after him.
Lyrics: B - This is a good story song, full of facts that are rattled of in the style of some 50's lyrics. Only problem with this is that the lyrics are one dimensional.
Structure: B - Lots of verses that force musical repetition. Makes it hard to stick with what's going on.
Melody: C - I remember the story... but not the melody. There is nothing musically wrong with it. It just doesn't stick.
I found this one very entertaining, but because it was so repetitive I kept tuning out. I had to back up the song once or twice to get back into the story. Fun but musically uninteresting.
Fired - David Ritter
Challenge: F - This is a song about getting fired or maybe about a person that got you fired, not about a hometown. It does reference a town but there is no reason to think it's a hometown. In fact, it sounds as if a lyric change was made in hopes of qualifying it for this challenge, which doesn't bode well.
Lyrics: B - Not bad... but not great. Pretty straight forward statements.
Structure: B - Fairly normal structure with a guitar solo that distracts from (rather than enhances) the tune.
Melody: A - Good melody. Sticks pretty well.
This is a fun song. I like it. Reminds me of my twenty's. Unfortunately, I really feel like this doesn't qualify as a "hometown" song. It's just not enough to reference a town in two lines. I mean, would you put this on a "hometowns" mix tape? Just sayin'.
Starts Over Avalon - Governing Dynamics
Challenge: B - While this song is clearly about a place, we never know where that is until almost the end of the song.
Lyrics: B - Some nice imagery but nothing that elevates it above average.
Structure: B - Solid structure but the pace calls for some changes. Perhaps no bridge and just go with the guitar solo. I like the way it falls into the next verse.
Melody: C - Not bad, but not sticking in my head either.
This one has a nice texture to it. Feels like Autumn. I got a little bored around the bridge and thought the guitar solo should replace it. All in all, a good song.
To The End Of The World - Duality
Challenge: A - This is clearly about Dundee.
Lyrics: A - Great imagery.
Structure: B - a sweeping and unusual structure that, while beautiful, causes me to drift off a bit.
Melody: B - Beautiful but not easily remembered.
As a piece of music, I think this is fantastic. Sweeping and beautiful. As a song, however, it lacks a bit. I want to hear this music backing up a dramatic scene in a film... but not on the radio.
Lansing, Michigan - Edric Haleen
Challenge: A - Clearly about Lansing, Michigan
Lyrics: A - Great, fun, funny and clever lyrics. Love it.
Structure: A - Classic, solid structure with some surprising and wonderful breaks. Very theatrical.
Melody: A - Very catchy. Serves the style very well.
Love this song. This serves as an example of someone who knows the rules of songwriting and knows how and when to break them. Wonderful work.
LBC - wait WHAT
Challenge: A - This clearly about LBC.
Lyrics: D - Very one dimensional. Poor rhymes. Sophomoric imagery.
Structure: C - Nothing technically wrong with the structure but very repetitive.
Melody: C - Not bad... but doesn't stick.
Thought this was gonna be a good song when I heard the first lyric. It was a clever rhyme... and then the rest of the song happened. Lots of stereo typing in an attempt to be funny. It just makes the songwriter seem ignorant. I did think the harmonica solo was nice though.
South Bend Aid - Brian Gray
Challenge: A - Clearly about South Bend
Lyrics: A - Good solid lyrics. Funny.
Structure: A - Good classic structure with a nice key shift.
Melody: A - Good. Easy to hum.
Great song. Nice mock of a charity anthem. I LOL'd.
Stillwater MN Air - Charlie McCarron
Challenge: A - Clearly about Stillwater.
Lyrics: A - Funny. Like these lyrics a lot.
Structure: A - Some unusual shifts but they all worked for me.
Melody: B - Good. Odd but good.
This song is much better than it sounds. I didn't realize how good it was until I had listened to it a few times. Great work.
Cheltenham - Emperor Gum
Challenge: B - Definitely about a place but you'll miss where if you aren't paying attention.
Lyrics: B - Nice rhymes but not much imagery.
Structure: C - very basic and repetative.
Melody: B - Not bad but not that memorable.
I like this song. I might shorten it by removing a verse or two and create a bridge. I think that would help make it more listenable.
Leaving Ann Arbor - Common Lisp
Challenge: A - Clearly about Ann Arbor.
Lyrics: A - Some very clever rhymes and interesting phrasing.
Structure: A - The basic structure isn't bad but a little odd. Took me out of the song a few times. Did enjoy the rap break though.
Melody: B - Solid melody in the chorus but the verses left me wanting more.
This song gets extra points for the rap break. If it had a better melody during the verses, I would have ranked it a bit higher. This stands out as the most original effort in this contest.
London - Mitchell Adam Johnson
Challenge: A - Clearly about London.
Lyrics: A - Nice imagery and good rhymes.
Structure: A - Classic pop structure.
Melody: A - Great. Very catchy.
This is a great piece of pop music. Love it.
Here - Rebecca Brickley
Challenge: B - This song is really about lost love while referencing a place. But we do (barely) find out where.
Lyrics: A - Great imagery and nice rhymes.
Structure: A - Good, solid structure.
Melody: A - Wonderful. Still stuck in my head.
I really love this song. Heartfelt and wistful. My only real issue is that it's about a person and not a place. It meets the challenge, but only by a hair.
I Love LA - Charlie Wolf
Challenge: A - This is clearly about Los Angeles.
Lyrics: B - Not bad but could be more visual.
Structure: B - Good structure but could be better with some work.
Melody: A - I like this melody. Very pleasant.
I like this song. It makes me smile. With some more time this song could be better though. I think the bridge could be better.
San Francisco - Ominous Ride
Challenge: A - About San Francisco. No question.
Lyrics: B - Solid imagery but not above average.
Structure: B - Solid but a bit repetitive. Could use a more developed chorus.
Melody: B - Not bad but not sticking in my head like it should.
This song is almost great. Or rather, it could be great with some more work. I would turn what is now the chorus into a lead-in and write a new, more involved chorus. It would make this song bigger and better.
Level - Swatshots
Challenge: D - This is about a place but, aside from a play on words, you never reference what place.
Lyrics: C - Seems like imagery for the sake of imagery. Not really painting a clear picture.
Structure: C - Odd structure. Seems to have been rearranged after the fact.
Melody: D - I'm used to hearing mediocre melodies, but this one is pretty bad. Almost un-pretty.
This song is probably my least favorite in the competition. It barely meets the challenge and isn't easy to listen to. I want to give some constructive criticism here, but I don't know where to start... oh wait, yes I do. Start "over".
Song For St. Michael - Russ Rogers
Challenge: A - Clearly about St. Michael.
Lyrics: B - Solid. Some tiny issues.
Structure: A - Classic ballad structure.
Melody: A - Very nice. Poignant.
Really nice tune. Great use of some minor chords. Reminds me of John Lennon in style. My only real critique is that I wish it stuck with the story telling aspect used in the first verse, in the second verse as well. Instead it switches over to a description. But, all in all, a great song.
Fairfield - Chris Cogott
Challenge: A - Clearly about Fairfield.
Lyrics: A - Odd but good. Reminds me of They Might Be Giants.
Structure: A - Classic pop structure. Solid.
Melody: A - Great. Very catchy.
I love this song. I'll admit, style has a lot to do with it. I'm a sucker for Power Pop. But even without the great production and harmonies and wonderful bass work, this is still a solid song. Great job.
From There - Ross Durand
Challenge: A - About Thousand Oaks.
Lyrics: B - Not bad but not above average.
Structure: A - Classic rock structure.
Melody: B - Not bad but not that memorable.
This one sounds like an Eagles B-side. Not a bad song but clearly not a single. There isn't really anything wrong with this tune... it just doesn't sound special to me.
Golden Valley Sunday - Ryan "Ruff" Smith
Challenge: A - A song about the Golden Valley.
Lyrics: A - Nice imagery and rhyme work.
Structure: A - Solid.
Melody: A - Great. Sounds like you've heard it before except you haven't.
This is wonderful tune. Written in a different time it would stand out as a jazz standard. If I close my eyes, I can see a solo pianist playing it in a small club. Very nice work.
Not In Copiague - JoAnn Abbott
Challenge: A - A song about Copiague.
Lyrics: B - Nice but not above average.
Structure: B - Standard. But given the pace, could be improved.
Melody: A - Very nice. Pleasant.
This is a hard song to critique because without accompaniment, it makes it difficult to judge what's really intended. The difference between a good song and a great song can sometimes be the way it takes a left turn and I can't properly judge that without hearing the chords that are being used to support the melody. This song could be better than we think.
It's My Hometown, Syracuse, Baby! - The Boffo Yux Dudes
Challenge: A - Clearly about Syracuse.
Lyrics: B - Not bad but not great. A few funny lines though.
Structure: B - Standard but with a few left turns that I'm not convince help it.
Melody: B - Not bad but not as catchy as I'd like.
I like the comedy aspect of this one but musically, it didn't hold my attention. I might re-think the arrangement and shorten it. I think that would make it more enjoyable.
Darktown - Gweebol
Challenge: A - A song about Darktown.
Lyrics: A - Good imagery. Almost creepy... but in a good way.
Structure: A - Odd but good.
Melody: A - Odd but good.
This is an interesting tune. Grows on you once it gets under your skin. This one might become my favorite over time.
Where I'm Gonna Go - Zarni DeWet
Challenge: B - Meets the challenge but I'm still not sure exactly where we are talking about. Is it around these towns or part of them?
Lyrics: A - Some of the best imagery and rhyming I've heard in this competition.
Structure: A - Solid.
Melody: A - Great. Memorable.
This is a wonderful song. One of the few where I really get a sense of what it's like to be where the singer is singing about. I only wish it was a little more clear as to the place. It would have made all the difference.
Fairfield - Heather Miller
Challenge: A - A song about fairfield.
Lyrics: B - Not bad but not above average.
Structure: B - Fairly standard but I would make a few cuts to some of the repeating verses in the chorus.
Melody: B - not bad but not very memorable.
This is a pleasant tune but pretty average. Not sure what to suggest to improve it. Some songs are just B's... they all can't be amazing.
In Paradise With You - Steve Durand
Challenge: A - This is clearly about Kihei.
Lyrics: B - Nice but what you'd expect from the style.
Structure: B - Exactly what you'd expect from the style.
Melody: A - Very nice. Sounds like we all know it except that we don't.
I'm very conflicted with this one. I want to rate it higher because it stays true to the style... but... the style isn't anything to write home about.. but... I get why he chose it because of the location... but... argh... I like it. Good job.
Shadows:
I Just Can't Find A Virgin - Duality
Challenge: B - Really about looking for a virgin in Dundee. But is clear that it's his hometown.
Lyrics: A - Great. Funny.
Structure: A - Solid.
Melody: A - Catchy.
I really wish this one the official entry from Duality. It's much more fun than "To The End Of The World". I ranked this one higher because it did better what it was trying to do than the official entry. Great, fun song!
From Home - Via Satellite
Challenge: B - Clearly about a place but not sure exactly where.
Lyrics: B - Seems a little mellow dramatic. Then again, I didn't live there.
Structure: C - Sweeping. Didn't hold my attention like I thought it should.
Melody: C - Not bad but not memorable. Like a Kate Bush B-side.
This is a very powerful song. I wish it was a little less grand and gave us some depth. I'm sure some will bathe in this song, it's just not my temperature.
Living In The Countryside - Bram Tant
Challenge: A - A song about Bachte-Maria-Leerne.
Lyrics: A - Good rhymes. Nice imagery.
Structure: B - Not bad but I might make some tweaks.
Melody: B - Not bad but not as catchy as it could be.
I really enjoyed the de-evolution of the singers perspective in this song. I might tweak the structure a little to make the song feel less long. I am looking forward to hearing more work from you, Bram.
And now, my ranking of all the songs in Spintunes #2. (This was very difficult. Several songs landed in the same place using my objective (letter grade) scale so I had to go back to what I enjoyed the most to break those ties... and it was still very hard. Anyway, here it is:
1. London - Mitchell Adam Johnson
2. Lansing, Michigan - Edric Haleen
3. Fairfield - Chris Cogott
4. A Song About Woodsetts - Danny Blackwell
5. Golden Valley Sunday - Ryan "Ruff" Smith
6. Darktown - Gweebol
7. South Bend Aid - Brian Gray
8. Here - Rebecca Brickley
9. Where I'm Gonna Go - Zarni DeWet
10. Oxford - Ben Walker
11. Leaving Ann Arbor - Common Lisp
12. Song For St. Michael - Russ Rogers
13. Stillwater MN Air - Charlie McCarron
14. I Love LA - Charlie Wolf
15. From There - Ross Durand
16. In Paradise With You - Steve Durand
17. To The End Of The World - Duality
18. Not In Copiague - JoAnn Abbott
19. San Francisco - Ominous Ride
20. Mount Holly - Austin Criswell
21. Fairfield - Heather Miller
22. The Pinpoint Accurate Telling Of The Origin Of Salem, OH - Inverse T. Clown
23. It's My Hometown, Syracuse, Baby! - The Boffo Yux Dudes
24. Starts Over Avalon - Governing Dynamics
25. Cheltenham - Emperor Gum
26. LBC - wait WHAT
27. Level - Swatshots
28. Fired - David Ritter
Saturday, October 16, 2010
SpinTunes #2 Round 1 Review: Kevin Savino-Riker
Before I get into the reviews, I’ve got two things to get out of the way.
This was an incredible round. There’s quality and there’s a ton of it here. There were relatively few things I had actual problems with; everything else wowed me to varying degrees. Unfortunately, though, there’s no room for ties; not at the top, not anywhere. This means it’s possible that a song I’d give a general score of 90% might only walk away with five or ten points, while a song that I’d score 95% might walk away with 28 points. The points are not a measure of overall quality; they’re of relative quality, and with a field this tight there will be some exaggerated gaps between high-ranking and low-ranking songs, even if I think they’re both pretty damn good.
Here’s how I’m going to put you in order. I put the musicality of a song and the poetry of the song on equal and prominent footing. By which I mean, the *writing* of the music and the lyrical content have the same sway over me. If you choose a particularly tasty sequence of notes and intervals between them, that will make as big an impact on me as if you had written a very clever, moving, or otherwise exceptional lyric. If you’ve done both, it will be better still. Right up there in importance is how well you’ve met the challenge while doing those two things. Someone who wrote a song that aces the challenge has done better than someone who wrote an equally pleasing song that only barely satisfies the challenge. For this round, the more I can get a sense of what your town is like, the better you’ve done. Lastly, but still importantly, is the performance. By ‘performance’, I don’t necessarily mean ‘production values’. I’ve listened to everyone’s songs on reference monitors, and I’ve passed them all through a lo-fi filter. If there was passion and quality in your recording, it’ll be evident no matter the quality of the equipment that captured you. That said, I expect there will be a loose correlation between production value and rank... but only because I expect the better songwriters among us are the ones more likely to have the experience, equipment and expertise to best capture the song they wrote. Lastly-lastly (and my escape clause), is the “it” factor. This is still an art of subjectivity and subtlety. My preferences might escape my own reasoning. I might find one funny song better than a serious song, and find another serious song better than the funny one. If a song excels, and I mean, *really* excels in one criterion, it could make up for a deficiency in another. If a song stirs my emotions, it’s going to do VERY well.
Alright, now that that’s done, let’s hit some reviews. To be fair to contestants I’m not already familiar with, I’m treating all these songs as if they’re the first thing I’ve ever heard from you; my opinions on your previous bodies of work will not affect how I rank you here. Songs are reviewed in the order they appear on the album, and my ranked list appears at the end of the post.
-----------------------------
Danny Blackwell - A Song About Woodsetts: A sweet nostalgia piece in a pleasant folk style. Upon repeated listens, the guitars grow on me - there’s more here than I noticed at first. This song isn’t so much about the town as it is a song about you at that time in your life, and while you write a nice depiction of your experiences, it only loosely approaches the challenge. In this case, the guitars brought you up a bit, but there are other songs here that will do better on the merits of meeting the challenge more directly.
Ben Walker - Oxford: This is one of the best songs of the round. It is expertly arranged with great subtle layers of instrumentation, and your lyrics are the most effectively descriptive of the lot. I’ve never been there, but I feel an almost intimate familiarity with it. Your story arc reveals exactly what you tell us in the chorus.... and on that note, I was delighted with the unique “spring attached to your back” metaphor. That’s a really inventive and impactful way to punctuate the theme that you’ll always be pulled back home. I don’t know if it was intentional, but the snare-drum brushstrokes reminded me of an erasing chalkboard. I was very close to putting this at the top, but I ultimately didn’t because of your ‘Cheers’ outro - it’s a risk bringing someone else’s creative work into a contest that’s supposed to showcase your creativity... I appreciate that it’s a fitting tribute, but you honestly don’t need to supplement a near-perfect song with a gimmick; I won’t be surprised if you have trouble with the other judges on this.
Austin Criswell - Mount Holly: Nice guitar and really pure vocals here, but this is a simple song about a lost love, and the destination city is barely more than a plot device. I could put any other city’s name in this space and it doesn’t change the song a bit. You’re a great singer, but I needed more of the challenge criteria for this one.
Inverse T. Clown - The pinpoint Accurate Telling Of The Origin Of Salem, OH: This is a fanciful and clever fictionalization/dramatization of the city’s actual history. The lyrics here are smart and entertaining the whole way through, and the storytelling talent on display here is worth a lot. The music is suitably epic to match the storyline, and your voice is strong enough to stand out over the intensity of the arrangement. This is in a category all its own.
David Ritter - Fired: This was the only song we had to DQ, and it’s a shame because this is a very talented composition. The music, arrangement, lyrics, vocals.... it’s all here. It’s a great fun song, but it has nothing do with the challenge. You followed the letter of the law, but completely missed the intention; if I were just judging this song on quality alone, the only critique I’d give you would be that you should strike the lyric about Stillwater because it’s a complete non sequitur. Having said that, I hope you continue to shadow in the upcoming rounds because you’re good at this and I’d like to see what else you come up with.
Governing Dynamics - Stars Over Avalon: This song gets a lot of things right. The music rivals anything I’ve heard in the ‘90s alternative / pop heyday. The guitars are fantastic, and they really carry the weight of the song. Despite being a personal tale, the lyrics never lose sight of their aim to convey the smallness of Avalon. There are some great lines, especially “If the news is a battle, we are soldiers far from the fight”. The only thing missing here is a hook. To my ears I hear extended verses, a slight musical change, more verses, a bridge-ish verse, and so on, but none of the parts really felt like a distinct chorus, and this song would be a knockout if it had one. The vocals sound a little... tentative... but I don’t know if that’s actually reservation on your part or just the timbre of your voice. The main thing is the lack of distinction between the verse and chorus.
Duality - To The End Of The World: Strong, soaring vocals and brooding rumbly piano combine to make a ballad that’s equal parts love song for your home and for your lover. This is one of the few songs that was successful in not-being-just-about-your-hometown-while-still-being-about-your-hometown. The lyrics strike a melancholy note in that you cannot have both together, though for me, the song didn’t manage to evoke the emotion to match that sentiment. It’s a great performance, though, reminiscent of the musical interludes featured in those Riverdance/Celtic-Thunder type productions I used to catch on the public broadcasting networks.
Edric Haleen - Lansing, Michigan: Coming into this competition with an a capella arrangement is a bit like bringing a knife to a gunfight, but that makes this song a slice-and-dice fest. This barbershop quartet performance is a vocal masterpiece; the tight harmonies and tempo changes showcase your excellent control and more than make up for the absence of any instrumentation. Add to that the lighthearted and wickedly funny implementation of informative lyrics, and you have a song that tops my “entertaining hometown song” list.
wait WHAT - LBC: Basically a list of factoids set to music, you’ve written the most information-dense song of the competition. That you editorialized those facts with wry and vaguely offensive jokes might give you trouble with some people, but I found it to be a successfully straight-faced funny song. Kudos for the nod to Snoop Dogg in the wording of your chorus; it works on multiple levels. Musically, the vocals, while on-pitch, sound a bit like you’re doing karaoke instead of singing your own song, if that makes any sense. On the other hand, you have solid instrumentation, a catchy tune and a nice guitar/harmonica break; these last three things coupled with your unashamed willingness to celebrate potty humor turn what should be an average song into something that has an unexpected charm to it. ***full-disclosure: these guys are very good friends and bandmates of mine. I originally placed this song lower in the ranks out of some sense of cautiousness not to be biased, but I ended up being artificially critical and that’s unfair to them. I ask for everyone to have faith that I’m placing their song where I think it deserves to be.***
Brian Gray - South Bend Aid: Wow... this song is just hilarious. The “celebrity charity song” is a really creative way to address the challenge, and the musical swell you create is a perfect parody of the genre. Your lyrics are not only intelligent and funny, they’re excellently constructed. These lyrics are rich with internal and mid-line rhymes, and the cadence is deliberate - every line is laid out just right. You pull off the choir vocals nicely, and while it’s not my favorite song here, it’s one of the strongest overall efforts.
Charlie McCarron - Stillwater MN Air: This song is the sound of Surreal. The music here is very intricate and distinctive, like it’s carrying more information than I can take in, but without also being cluttered or distracting. The core of the song is your unique voice and the story you’re telling. It’s another song-about-home-but-kind-of-a-love-song-too, and it slips off target a little as you get more focused on the story of raising your family. It’s full of beautiful imagery, and I especially like the contrast between yours and your spouse’s views of the little details of the home you’re fantasizing about. While it only casually meets the challenge, it’s one of the most interesting listening experiences of the round.
Emperor Gum - Cheltenham: You’ve hit on an interesting bit of music that sort of tumbles over itself in a series of ebbs and flows; it doesn’t seem to follow traditional verse-chorus structure, but instead proceeds like a limerick beat-poem. And the lyrics are *very* poem-y. This reminds me a bit of the Beatles in the middle of their hallucinogen-fueled experimental phase. Vocals shift between actual harmonies and emotive crowd speech. Depending on my mood, I either feel like this is a daring examination of where the line is drawn between song and poetry, or like I’d need to be on mind-expanding chemicals to fully appreciate it.
Common Lisp - Leaving Ann Arbor: Starting out as a stylish sing-songy guitar pop-folk piece, you have a nice lead guitar lick and great interplay between the guitar parts and bass line... but then the gear change into a fully-produced prog-rock rap track caught me off guard. It was sort of a “we now interrupt this song to bring you... THIS OTHER SONG” moment. The transition back to the pop-folk outro felt much more natural to me, though, so I’m not sure how to suggest a better way to lead into the rap segment. The lyrics throughout the song are great; this whole song is an awesome frustrated kiss-off; you got some great digs in there. The sound bites are a nice touch. Taken individually, I love each part of the song. The intro and outro lyrics are wistful and sweet, nicely matching the softness of the music, while the rap interlude completely rocks and the lyrics accordingly take on that great pissed-off edge. Taken as a whole, if the transition were a little less abrupt, I’d be less inclined to want this to be two separate songs.
Mitchell Adam Johnson - London: Okay, now this is what I’m talking about. This song is pop-perfect, radio-ready. This is so well done on all fronts that I’m not going to have much to say. The arrangement is total ear candy, the tune is catchy, the vocals are top notch, the instruments are expertly played, and it just elevates my mood when I listen to it. I feel like you’ve beaten us at our own game, in a sense. By singing *to* the town instead of about it, you’ve written a song that’s clearly about your home, despite your not describing it in great detail. I think you were a little too clever for us, and as such I have to give you full marks for meeting the challenge in a sneaky way.
Rebecca Brickley - Here: Beautiful. Soulful piano rock that switches effortlessly between delicate and driving. Your voice is so interestingly colored, and when you break into the prechorus before the drums kick in, it gives me shivers. There are a couple places where you get a little off-pitch, but I’ll forgive it for how emotive your vocals are throughout the entire song. Now, there’s no disguising that this is a love/nostalgia song, and the city plays a backdrop in a couple spots, but it’s used more as a metaphorical place in your memory. But, this is one of those cases where something in your chord progression, melody, and performance just move me... the song is good enough to overcome the handicap of not meeting the challenge as closely as others have. You’ve got everything else you need; hit the next challenge squarely and you’ll be in the fight for a top spot.
Charlie Wolf - I love LA: I wish this song were longer. You’ve got a great melody and nice folk guitar accompaniment, and while I question your sanity a little bit, “I love this town like I love the freeway” is a really intriguing and poetic lyric. I for one love to drive, but I hate LA traffic. Part of me projects a little of my own experience into this and assumes you could be talking about a love/hate/necessary evil relationship, but the rest of the song doesn’t sound like that’s how you feel about it. I’d have loved a verse or two that explores that idea in particular so I get a better sense of what it means to *you*. I feel like there’s more song in here if only you let it come out.
Ominous Ride - San Francisco: Using a well-worn guitar progression isn’t going to blow anyone’s minds, but let’s face it - that progression is well-worn because it sounds good. In this case, it’s really only there to give you something to sing over, and this song is made on its solidly-constructed rock vocals. You’ve got a good melody rendered great with the harmonies, though it’s all a little too effected for my taste, especially with the guitar being equally flanged out. “And I don’t know why I come back / and I don’t know how I really feel” is the killer lyric for me. The rest of the lyrics are again, solid. That’s pretty much my feeling on the whole thing. I’d call it an average song, but the vocal composition brings it up a few pegs. This song is... solid. A technical note - there were a couple spots where the guitar and drums get out of sync with each other... it’s usually not a big deal, but it’s very noticeable when you have a staccato strum pattern over syncopated drums. When it’s “on”, it sounds great, but as soon as it’s even slightly off, it’s really distracting. The drums sound like they were done on a machine, so I assume it’s the guitar falling off pace. If you don’t already do so, I’d try recording with a click track to alleviate this.
Swatshots - Level: There’s some neat programming going on (especially at the end), but I have a huge problem with the vocal treatment. If I had to guess, I’d say you aren’t confident in your voices, so you saturated them in reverb and buried them in the mix. It just doesn’t come off like a stylistic choice (and if it was, then I have another piece of advice for you - in a songwriting competition, it’s always a good idea to make your vocals prominent - weak vocals in front of a mix are better than indecipherable ones behind such a strong rhythm track). They get a little louder in the second verse, but I’m still straining to hear it. Lyrically, you’re gonna have a hard time making a fan out of me; I have little patience for generic angsty songs. That said, I have to give credit to the first two stanzas. The paper factory fire leads into some pretty well-written angry lyrics, and you have a nice turn of phrase with ‘level the Plainfield’, but then it effectively degrades into “this place is small and it sucks, and it REALLY sucks”. Never mind the fact that Plainfield looks like an absolutely gorgeous community... if you want to convince me that it’s worth hating, then give me something substantial to hate - don’t be stingy with the details.
Russ Rogers - Song For St. Micheal: What we have here is a small song for a small town. You’ve got a GREAT refrain and I’m glad you give it to us throughout the song; with those three lines I get a strong concept not just of the town, but also of the mindset of the people in it. The sad thing is, that refrain is almost all you’ve given us. It’s a really enjoyable listen, but in critiquing it, it feels a little more like a case of writers’ block. I have a hard time placing this, because I firmly believe that it’s important to have a simple song every once in awhile, and this song does ‘simple’ exquisitely... but I can’t in clear conscience put it above songs that try harder and deliver more content.
Chris Cogott - Fairfield: This just blows me away. Once more, we have a radio-ready tune. This is without a doubt the most impressive musical performance of the round (bonus points for changing up the number of beats in the measures of your main riff; that’s like musical catnip to me). Great use of lead and background vocals, and while this song is chock-full of instrumentation, it never feels crowded. The mood is fun, fun, fun, energy, energy, energy, and your lyrics are informative, personally revealing, and super catchy. I love it.
Ross Durand - From There: Man oh man. I’ve always said that guitarists shouldn’t be allowed to use drop D tuning until they’ve proven that they’re good enough not to need it; this song is a textbook example of how to use it right. I’ve done my best to avoid making comparisons to popular music in any of these reviews, but I have to do it here: you’ve taken the guitar sexiness from Bon Jovi’s “Dead Or Alive” and the nostalgic poetic beauty of James Taylor’s ‘Copperline’ and translated them into a terrific country-rock ode to the home you will always have, but will always miss. You’ve got a perfect voice for this style of music and your words capture that feeling of adult regret over childhood ignorance. Awesome song.
Ryan “Ruff” Smith - Golden Valley Sunday: I wasn’t looking forward to writing this review, because I’m having a hard time coming up with a compliment good enough for it. This song is so good, I want to eat it for breakf... um... no. This song is so good, I want to wear it to the... no. Okay, here we go: If this song was on the Christmas albums I listened to growing up, I’d still believe in Jesus. Your voice is a whisper sung out loud, and your jazz is so pure and professional it makes me want to meet a nice girl, move back to New York, load up the woodstove, and cuddle up in a blanket with a bottle of wine while you play in the corner of the living room. Nightly. The lyric, “city streets, slick with dirty city sleet” is the best line. Not the best line of the song, the best line of the contest. That line is dense with alliteration, rhyme and gorgeous description. On top of that your melody is just right and your guitar work is jazzy flawlessness. This song *is* a blanket in front of the woodstove. So well done.
JoAnn Abbott - Not in Copiague: This song is facing a massive handicap. I’ll abandon pretending not to know your previous work for a moment so I can touch on this. You’ve had luck in the past getting guest musicians to come in and back you up, and I’m bummed that you didn’t get it this time. I’m imagining different flavors of backing music, and the conclusion that I come to is that this song could just be another average little thing -or- it could have potential with just the right accompaniment. Unfortunately though, all I have to go by is your melody... which is nice... but I can’t say that it ever wows me. As for your lyrics, you share a very heartfelt and emotionally baring bit of reminiscence. My favorite part is your description of the cookie-cutter nature of these adjacent towns, using “another Copiague” to great effect. I love the story here, but I think you got stuck in a lose-lose situation. The song is long. I imagine you felt a need to make up for a lack of music by going longer on content - that gives you full marks for meeting the challenge, but it also detracts from the listening experience. Lemme try to explain this a little better - If you had music behind you, you could afford to take a few pauses and let the song rise and fall a bit, keeping things fresh for the listener. Unfortunately, without any music you’re forced to sing constantly, which removes all dynamics. It tricks the ear into feeling like it’s hearing one long verse, and as pleasant as your singing is, a three-and-a-half minute verse is tedious to listen to. I think a good rule for anyone doing solo a capella songs is that short n’ sweet is the way to go. The last half of this song includes a bunch of repeated phrases that could have easily been condensed into fewer verses, which would’ve helped a lot.
The Boffo Yux Dudes - It’s My Hometown, Syracuse, Baby! I like the music here, the stacking of all those different organ voicings really supplement the song, especially the synth wah solo. There’s a slight corniness inherent in the vocals as they change character from “low voice” to “high voice”, which suits the lyrics perfectly. They aren’t as slapstick as Brian Gray’s or Edric Haleen’s, but they’re still enjoyable goofy and full of information. I laughed out loud at “It’s the best large town in Mid-Central New York”.
Gweebol - Darktown: When this song started, I thought to myself, “who the hell is trying to kill a typewriter?”... but when you started singing, I forgot what I was thinking about, and I kinda lost track of where I was for a minute. My god, I’m utterly dumbfounded by your voice. It seems almost... juvenile-innocent, yet somehow mature and sexy, and terribly emotive. I’ve been noting “best ____s” here and there in my reviews... and you, my dear, have written the contest’s best melody. That melody, sung in your delicate honest voice makes this one of two songs that actually brought me to tears when I heard them. As if that weren’t enough, the piano and drum track (once I get over the snare fill in the intro) turn the whole thing into a dark cabaret masterpiece. Lyrically, well, the way you translate thoughts to words is fascinating. The anthropomorphization of the town’s features spectacularly portrays it as some kind of haunted playland. Ooh, and while we’re talking about haunting - your ‘banshee voices’ were a great use of background vocals. This, I’m pretty sure, is my favorite song here.
Zarni DeWet - Where I’m Gonna Go: I have to make sure I’m alone whenever I play this song. Without fail, within ten seconds or so, this song turns me into a blubbering, sobbing, useless mess. I mean, completely useless. I have to turn it off so I can write this. Yes, the piano is powerful and beautiful, your singing is beautiful, the picture you paint with your words in the song’s opening is just heart-aching, and the rest of your lyrics are so empowering... but moreso, this is a perfect storm of “it” factor. Objectively speaking, there are some flashier, “better” songs here, songs that I enjoy more even, but none of them manage to elicit such a profound emotional response in me, and as such, I have to grant the top spot to you.
Heather Miller - Fairfield: Out of all the U.S. residents submitting songs here, this one is alone in taking on a classic Americana vibe; you make the sort of case that would convince John Mellencamp to spend some time here. The song is jovial and affectionate, and so descriptive until you get to the chorus. On one hand, you’ve told me all about the town in your verses, but I can’t help but want to hear a little more than just, “that’s Fairfield”. The best example I can give is Ben Walker’s song - he treats the verse as exposition, and the chorus as an emotional conclusion, and I think that if this song had something similar, it would really pop. I really like the sound you got out of your guitar - every guitarist has their own “handwriting” in a sense; little nuances in strum patterns and the way you move on and off the fretboard between chords... all those little sounds work so well for this song. It really lends to that small-town, homey, Americana feeling that I can actually hear you playing your instrument as if I was catching it at a local show. I notice something in your vocals; you seem to spend a lot of time in a low register, but it sounds like you might be struggling a bit down there. When you hit your high notes your singing gets a fair bit stronger... I’m not sure exactly how to leverage this for future songs, but I suspect that singing in a higher range might do good things for you.
Steve Durand - In Paradise With You: Maybe it’s luck that you lived in a place where the local music is very distinctive, but I really appreciate that your song style itself is just rich with identity. On that alone, it leaves you with much less work to satisfy the challenge. And despite that, you give us great imagery of the island life and a sweet turn at the end as you dedicate it to your love. While this song isn’t likely to make it into heavy rotation on my ipod, it comes off as an authentic homage and is an absolute bullseye for this challenge.
SHADOW ENTRIES:
Duality - I Just Can’t Find A Virgin: The devil is a bluegrass yokel; who’d have known (besides Charlie Daniels, I mean)? I know that this is sort of a throwaway joke song, but its unrelenting silliness is so damn enjoyable. Your serious entry was beautiful, but I had a much better time listening to this one. The duet vocals dance around each other in a haphazardly (and yet deliberate) manner that I cannot get enough of. You’re a little crazy for writing two songs when everyone else here is struggling to get one good song in, but here you are showing versatility, talent, and a true passion for making music, no matter where it takes you. Thanks for this!
via Satellite - From Home: Oh, man. It’s a bummer that this didn’t make the deadline. I’ve heard some of your older work from Song Fu’s past, and I have to say, you’ve done some serious improving. I like everything about this song. The arrangement is very nicely layered, and the way you accelerate into the chorus is just delicious. I said it before; playing with tempo and time signatures, especially polyrhythms, is like catnip to me, and you guys wow me over and over again with the drum track. The clean guitars work really well to make this a plaintive song instead of an angry one, and the string accompaniment just expands the scope of the thing like any good goth song should. You have a neat thing going on with your voice where your tone is very pure, but you have a couple great scratchy phrases that liven things up a bit. You only approach the challenge criteria obliquely, this mainly being a personal song, but the good news is you aren’t losing any points for that. I’m glad you wrote the song you did and am eagerly awaiting your next shadow.
Bram Tant - Living In The Countryside: Bram. Dude. I would so rather have had you sign up and miss the deadline than not sign up and get this song in on time. If Zarni’s song was my #1 on “it” factor, then this is little acoustic piece is my #2. This is a great example of when a song doesn’t need a full arrangement to strike a heavy blow. This song needs nothing more. In fact, if we could get your vocals rerecorded with a studio mic, I’d have you release it as-is. You’ve written a song for people who like to pay attention. At face value it’s pretty and upbeat, and your vocal melody is charming (the way you made ‘Bachte-Maria-Leerne’ flow musically is spot-on perfect), but you’ve embedded some wicked satire that just makes me pump my fist and go, “YEAH, YOU TELL ‘EM, BRAM!” This was, despite its sparseness, one of my favorite songs of the round. Sign up next time.
-----------------------------
(Number represents how many points they got from Kevin.)
28 - Zarni DeWet
27 - Ryan “Ruff” Smith
26 - Gweebol
25 - Chris Cogott
24 - Mitchell Adam Johnson
23 - Ross Durand
22 - Ben Walker
21 - Edric Haleen
20 - Rebecca Brickley
19 - Brian Gray
18 - Inverse T. Clown
17 - Common Lisp
16 - Steve Durand
15 - Duality
14 - wait WHAT
13 - Danny Blackwell
12 - Charlie McCarron
11 - Governing Dynamics
10 - The Boffo Yux Dudes
9 - Heather Miller
8 - Ominous Ride
7 - Russ Rogers
6 - Charlie Wolf
5 - Austin Criswell
4 - JoAnn Abbott
3 - Emperor Gum
2 - Swatshots
1 - David Ritter
This was an incredible round. There’s quality and there’s a ton of it here. There were relatively few things I had actual problems with; everything else wowed me to varying degrees. Unfortunately, though, there’s no room for ties; not at the top, not anywhere. This means it’s possible that a song I’d give a general score of 90% might only walk away with five or ten points, while a song that I’d score 95% might walk away with 28 points. The points are not a measure of overall quality; they’re of relative quality, and with a field this tight there will be some exaggerated gaps between high-ranking and low-ranking songs, even if I think they’re both pretty damn good.
Here’s how I’m going to put you in order. I put the musicality of a song and the poetry of the song on equal and prominent footing. By which I mean, the *writing* of the music and the lyrical content have the same sway over me. If you choose a particularly tasty sequence of notes and intervals between them, that will make as big an impact on me as if you had written a very clever, moving, or otherwise exceptional lyric. If you’ve done both, it will be better still. Right up there in importance is how well you’ve met the challenge while doing those two things. Someone who wrote a song that aces the challenge has done better than someone who wrote an equally pleasing song that only barely satisfies the challenge. For this round, the more I can get a sense of what your town is like, the better you’ve done. Lastly, but still importantly, is the performance. By ‘performance’, I don’t necessarily mean ‘production values’. I’ve listened to everyone’s songs on reference monitors, and I’ve passed them all through a lo-fi filter. If there was passion and quality in your recording, it’ll be evident no matter the quality of the equipment that captured you. That said, I expect there will be a loose correlation between production value and rank... but only because I expect the better songwriters among us are the ones more likely to have the experience, equipment and expertise to best capture the song they wrote. Lastly-lastly (and my escape clause), is the “it” factor. This is still an art of subjectivity and subtlety. My preferences might escape my own reasoning. I might find one funny song better than a serious song, and find another serious song better than the funny one. If a song excels, and I mean, *really* excels in one criterion, it could make up for a deficiency in another. If a song stirs my emotions, it’s going to do VERY well.
Alright, now that that’s done, let’s hit some reviews. To be fair to contestants I’m not already familiar with, I’m treating all these songs as if they’re the first thing I’ve ever heard from you; my opinions on your previous bodies of work will not affect how I rank you here. Songs are reviewed in the order they appear on the album, and my ranked list appears at the end of the post.
-----------------------------
Danny Blackwell - A Song About Woodsetts: A sweet nostalgia piece in a pleasant folk style. Upon repeated listens, the guitars grow on me - there’s more here than I noticed at first. This song isn’t so much about the town as it is a song about you at that time in your life, and while you write a nice depiction of your experiences, it only loosely approaches the challenge. In this case, the guitars brought you up a bit, but there are other songs here that will do better on the merits of meeting the challenge more directly.
Ben Walker - Oxford: This is one of the best songs of the round. It is expertly arranged with great subtle layers of instrumentation, and your lyrics are the most effectively descriptive of the lot. I’ve never been there, but I feel an almost intimate familiarity with it. Your story arc reveals exactly what you tell us in the chorus.... and on that note, I was delighted with the unique “spring attached to your back” metaphor. That’s a really inventive and impactful way to punctuate the theme that you’ll always be pulled back home. I don’t know if it was intentional, but the snare-drum brushstrokes reminded me of an erasing chalkboard. I was very close to putting this at the top, but I ultimately didn’t because of your ‘Cheers’ outro - it’s a risk bringing someone else’s creative work into a contest that’s supposed to showcase your creativity... I appreciate that it’s a fitting tribute, but you honestly don’t need to supplement a near-perfect song with a gimmick; I won’t be surprised if you have trouble with the other judges on this.
Austin Criswell - Mount Holly: Nice guitar and really pure vocals here, but this is a simple song about a lost love, and the destination city is barely more than a plot device. I could put any other city’s name in this space and it doesn’t change the song a bit. You’re a great singer, but I needed more of the challenge criteria for this one.
Inverse T. Clown - The pinpoint Accurate Telling Of The Origin Of Salem, OH: This is a fanciful and clever fictionalization/dramatization of the city’s actual history. The lyrics here are smart and entertaining the whole way through, and the storytelling talent on display here is worth a lot. The music is suitably epic to match the storyline, and your voice is strong enough to stand out over the intensity of the arrangement. This is in a category all its own.
David Ritter - Fired: This was the only song we had to DQ, and it’s a shame because this is a very talented composition. The music, arrangement, lyrics, vocals.... it’s all here. It’s a great fun song, but it has nothing do with the challenge. You followed the letter of the law, but completely missed the intention; if I were just judging this song on quality alone, the only critique I’d give you would be that you should strike the lyric about Stillwater because it’s a complete non sequitur. Having said that, I hope you continue to shadow in the upcoming rounds because you’re good at this and I’d like to see what else you come up with.
Governing Dynamics - Stars Over Avalon: This song gets a lot of things right. The music rivals anything I’ve heard in the ‘90s alternative / pop heyday. The guitars are fantastic, and they really carry the weight of the song. Despite being a personal tale, the lyrics never lose sight of their aim to convey the smallness of Avalon. There are some great lines, especially “If the news is a battle, we are soldiers far from the fight”. The only thing missing here is a hook. To my ears I hear extended verses, a slight musical change, more verses, a bridge-ish verse, and so on, but none of the parts really felt like a distinct chorus, and this song would be a knockout if it had one. The vocals sound a little... tentative... but I don’t know if that’s actually reservation on your part or just the timbre of your voice. The main thing is the lack of distinction between the verse and chorus.
Duality - To The End Of The World: Strong, soaring vocals and brooding rumbly piano combine to make a ballad that’s equal parts love song for your home and for your lover. This is one of the few songs that was successful in not-being-just-about-your-hometown-while-still-being-about-your-hometown. The lyrics strike a melancholy note in that you cannot have both together, though for me, the song didn’t manage to evoke the emotion to match that sentiment. It’s a great performance, though, reminiscent of the musical interludes featured in those Riverdance/Celtic-Thunder type productions I used to catch on the public broadcasting networks.
Edric Haleen - Lansing, Michigan: Coming into this competition with an a capella arrangement is a bit like bringing a knife to a gunfight, but that makes this song a slice-and-dice fest. This barbershop quartet performance is a vocal masterpiece; the tight harmonies and tempo changes showcase your excellent control and more than make up for the absence of any instrumentation. Add to that the lighthearted and wickedly funny implementation of informative lyrics, and you have a song that tops my “entertaining hometown song” list.
wait WHAT - LBC: Basically a list of factoids set to music, you’ve written the most information-dense song of the competition. That you editorialized those facts with wry and vaguely offensive jokes might give you trouble with some people, but I found it to be a successfully straight-faced funny song. Kudos for the nod to Snoop Dogg in the wording of your chorus; it works on multiple levels. Musically, the vocals, while on-pitch, sound a bit like you’re doing karaoke instead of singing your own song, if that makes any sense. On the other hand, you have solid instrumentation, a catchy tune and a nice guitar/harmonica break; these last three things coupled with your unashamed willingness to celebrate potty humor turn what should be an average song into something that has an unexpected charm to it. ***full-disclosure: these guys are very good friends and bandmates of mine. I originally placed this song lower in the ranks out of some sense of cautiousness not to be biased, but I ended up being artificially critical and that’s unfair to them. I ask for everyone to have faith that I’m placing their song where I think it deserves to be.***
Brian Gray - South Bend Aid: Wow... this song is just hilarious. The “celebrity charity song” is a really creative way to address the challenge, and the musical swell you create is a perfect parody of the genre. Your lyrics are not only intelligent and funny, they’re excellently constructed. These lyrics are rich with internal and mid-line rhymes, and the cadence is deliberate - every line is laid out just right. You pull off the choir vocals nicely, and while it’s not my favorite song here, it’s one of the strongest overall efforts.
Charlie McCarron - Stillwater MN Air: This song is the sound of Surreal. The music here is very intricate and distinctive, like it’s carrying more information than I can take in, but without also being cluttered or distracting. The core of the song is your unique voice and the story you’re telling. It’s another song-about-home-but-kind-of-a-love-song-too, and it slips off target a little as you get more focused on the story of raising your family. It’s full of beautiful imagery, and I especially like the contrast between yours and your spouse’s views of the little details of the home you’re fantasizing about. While it only casually meets the challenge, it’s one of the most interesting listening experiences of the round.
Emperor Gum - Cheltenham: You’ve hit on an interesting bit of music that sort of tumbles over itself in a series of ebbs and flows; it doesn’t seem to follow traditional verse-chorus structure, but instead proceeds like a limerick beat-poem. And the lyrics are *very* poem-y. This reminds me a bit of the Beatles in the middle of their hallucinogen-fueled experimental phase. Vocals shift between actual harmonies and emotive crowd speech. Depending on my mood, I either feel like this is a daring examination of where the line is drawn between song and poetry, or like I’d need to be on mind-expanding chemicals to fully appreciate it.
Common Lisp - Leaving Ann Arbor: Starting out as a stylish sing-songy guitar pop-folk piece, you have a nice lead guitar lick and great interplay between the guitar parts and bass line... but then the gear change into a fully-produced prog-rock rap track caught me off guard. It was sort of a “we now interrupt this song to bring you... THIS OTHER SONG” moment. The transition back to the pop-folk outro felt much more natural to me, though, so I’m not sure how to suggest a better way to lead into the rap segment. The lyrics throughout the song are great; this whole song is an awesome frustrated kiss-off; you got some great digs in there. The sound bites are a nice touch. Taken individually, I love each part of the song. The intro and outro lyrics are wistful and sweet, nicely matching the softness of the music, while the rap interlude completely rocks and the lyrics accordingly take on that great pissed-off edge. Taken as a whole, if the transition were a little less abrupt, I’d be less inclined to want this to be two separate songs.
Mitchell Adam Johnson - London: Okay, now this is what I’m talking about. This song is pop-perfect, radio-ready. This is so well done on all fronts that I’m not going to have much to say. The arrangement is total ear candy, the tune is catchy, the vocals are top notch, the instruments are expertly played, and it just elevates my mood when I listen to it. I feel like you’ve beaten us at our own game, in a sense. By singing *to* the town instead of about it, you’ve written a song that’s clearly about your home, despite your not describing it in great detail. I think you were a little too clever for us, and as such I have to give you full marks for meeting the challenge in a sneaky way.
Rebecca Brickley - Here: Beautiful. Soulful piano rock that switches effortlessly between delicate and driving. Your voice is so interestingly colored, and when you break into the prechorus before the drums kick in, it gives me shivers. There are a couple places where you get a little off-pitch, but I’ll forgive it for how emotive your vocals are throughout the entire song. Now, there’s no disguising that this is a love/nostalgia song, and the city plays a backdrop in a couple spots, but it’s used more as a metaphorical place in your memory. But, this is one of those cases where something in your chord progression, melody, and performance just move me... the song is good enough to overcome the handicap of not meeting the challenge as closely as others have. You’ve got everything else you need; hit the next challenge squarely and you’ll be in the fight for a top spot.
Charlie Wolf - I love LA: I wish this song were longer. You’ve got a great melody and nice folk guitar accompaniment, and while I question your sanity a little bit, “I love this town like I love the freeway” is a really intriguing and poetic lyric. I for one love to drive, but I hate LA traffic. Part of me projects a little of my own experience into this and assumes you could be talking about a love/hate/necessary evil relationship, but the rest of the song doesn’t sound like that’s how you feel about it. I’d have loved a verse or two that explores that idea in particular so I get a better sense of what it means to *you*. I feel like there’s more song in here if only you let it come out.
Ominous Ride - San Francisco: Using a well-worn guitar progression isn’t going to blow anyone’s minds, but let’s face it - that progression is well-worn because it sounds good. In this case, it’s really only there to give you something to sing over, and this song is made on its solidly-constructed rock vocals. You’ve got a good melody rendered great with the harmonies, though it’s all a little too effected for my taste, especially with the guitar being equally flanged out. “And I don’t know why I come back / and I don’t know how I really feel” is the killer lyric for me. The rest of the lyrics are again, solid. That’s pretty much my feeling on the whole thing. I’d call it an average song, but the vocal composition brings it up a few pegs. This song is... solid. A technical note - there were a couple spots where the guitar and drums get out of sync with each other... it’s usually not a big deal, but it’s very noticeable when you have a staccato strum pattern over syncopated drums. When it’s “on”, it sounds great, but as soon as it’s even slightly off, it’s really distracting. The drums sound like they were done on a machine, so I assume it’s the guitar falling off pace. If you don’t already do so, I’d try recording with a click track to alleviate this.
Swatshots - Level: There’s some neat programming going on (especially at the end), but I have a huge problem with the vocal treatment. If I had to guess, I’d say you aren’t confident in your voices, so you saturated them in reverb and buried them in the mix. It just doesn’t come off like a stylistic choice (and if it was, then I have another piece of advice for you - in a songwriting competition, it’s always a good idea to make your vocals prominent - weak vocals in front of a mix are better than indecipherable ones behind such a strong rhythm track). They get a little louder in the second verse, but I’m still straining to hear it. Lyrically, you’re gonna have a hard time making a fan out of me; I have little patience for generic angsty songs. That said, I have to give credit to the first two stanzas. The paper factory fire leads into some pretty well-written angry lyrics, and you have a nice turn of phrase with ‘level the Plainfield’, but then it effectively degrades into “this place is small and it sucks, and it REALLY sucks”. Never mind the fact that Plainfield looks like an absolutely gorgeous community... if you want to convince me that it’s worth hating, then give me something substantial to hate - don’t be stingy with the details.
Russ Rogers - Song For St. Micheal: What we have here is a small song for a small town. You’ve got a GREAT refrain and I’m glad you give it to us throughout the song; with those three lines I get a strong concept not just of the town, but also of the mindset of the people in it. The sad thing is, that refrain is almost all you’ve given us. It’s a really enjoyable listen, but in critiquing it, it feels a little more like a case of writers’ block. I have a hard time placing this, because I firmly believe that it’s important to have a simple song every once in awhile, and this song does ‘simple’ exquisitely... but I can’t in clear conscience put it above songs that try harder and deliver more content.
Chris Cogott - Fairfield: This just blows me away. Once more, we have a radio-ready tune. This is without a doubt the most impressive musical performance of the round (bonus points for changing up the number of beats in the measures of your main riff; that’s like musical catnip to me). Great use of lead and background vocals, and while this song is chock-full of instrumentation, it never feels crowded. The mood is fun, fun, fun, energy, energy, energy, and your lyrics are informative, personally revealing, and super catchy. I love it.
Ross Durand - From There: Man oh man. I’ve always said that guitarists shouldn’t be allowed to use drop D tuning until they’ve proven that they’re good enough not to need it; this song is a textbook example of how to use it right. I’ve done my best to avoid making comparisons to popular music in any of these reviews, but I have to do it here: you’ve taken the guitar sexiness from Bon Jovi’s “Dead Or Alive” and the nostalgic poetic beauty of James Taylor’s ‘Copperline’ and translated them into a terrific country-rock ode to the home you will always have, but will always miss. You’ve got a perfect voice for this style of music and your words capture that feeling of adult regret over childhood ignorance. Awesome song.
Ryan “Ruff” Smith - Golden Valley Sunday: I wasn’t looking forward to writing this review, because I’m having a hard time coming up with a compliment good enough for it. This song is so good, I want to eat it for breakf... um... no. This song is so good, I want to wear it to the... no. Okay, here we go: If this song was on the Christmas albums I listened to growing up, I’d still believe in Jesus. Your voice is a whisper sung out loud, and your jazz is so pure and professional it makes me want to meet a nice girl, move back to New York, load up the woodstove, and cuddle up in a blanket with a bottle of wine while you play in the corner of the living room. Nightly. The lyric, “city streets, slick with dirty city sleet” is the best line. Not the best line of the song, the best line of the contest. That line is dense with alliteration, rhyme and gorgeous description. On top of that your melody is just right and your guitar work is jazzy flawlessness. This song *is* a blanket in front of the woodstove. So well done.
JoAnn Abbott - Not in Copiague: This song is facing a massive handicap. I’ll abandon pretending not to know your previous work for a moment so I can touch on this. You’ve had luck in the past getting guest musicians to come in and back you up, and I’m bummed that you didn’t get it this time. I’m imagining different flavors of backing music, and the conclusion that I come to is that this song could just be another average little thing -or- it could have potential with just the right accompaniment. Unfortunately though, all I have to go by is your melody... which is nice... but I can’t say that it ever wows me. As for your lyrics, you share a very heartfelt and emotionally baring bit of reminiscence. My favorite part is your description of the cookie-cutter nature of these adjacent towns, using “another Copiague” to great effect. I love the story here, but I think you got stuck in a lose-lose situation. The song is long. I imagine you felt a need to make up for a lack of music by going longer on content - that gives you full marks for meeting the challenge, but it also detracts from the listening experience. Lemme try to explain this a little better - If you had music behind you, you could afford to take a few pauses and let the song rise and fall a bit, keeping things fresh for the listener. Unfortunately, without any music you’re forced to sing constantly, which removes all dynamics. It tricks the ear into feeling like it’s hearing one long verse, and as pleasant as your singing is, a three-and-a-half minute verse is tedious to listen to. I think a good rule for anyone doing solo a capella songs is that short n’ sweet is the way to go. The last half of this song includes a bunch of repeated phrases that could have easily been condensed into fewer verses, which would’ve helped a lot.
The Boffo Yux Dudes - It’s My Hometown, Syracuse, Baby! I like the music here, the stacking of all those different organ voicings really supplement the song, especially the synth wah solo. There’s a slight corniness inherent in the vocals as they change character from “low voice” to “high voice”, which suits the lyrics perfectly. They aren’t as slapstick as Brian Gray’s or Edric Haleen’s, but they’re still enjoyable goofy and full of information. I laughed out loud at “It’s the best large town in Mid-Central New York”.
Gweebol - Darktown: When this song started, I thought to myself, “who the hell is trying to kill a typewriter?”... but when you started singing, I forgot what I was thinking about, and I kinda lost track of where I was for a minute. My god, I’m utterly dumbfounded by your voice. It seems almost... juvenile-innocent, yet somehow mature and sexy, and terribly emotive. I’ve been noting “best ____s” here and there in my reviews... and you, my dear, have written the contest’s best melody. That melody, sung in your delicate honest voice makes this one of two songs that actually brought me to tears when I heard them. As if that weren’t enough, the piano and drum track (once I get over the snare fill in the intro) turn the whole thing into a dark cabaret masterpiece. Lyrically, well, the way you translate thoughts to words is fascinating. The anthropomorphization of the town’s features spectacularly portrays it as some kind of haunted playland. Ooh, and while we’re talking about haunting - your ‘banshee voices’ were a great use of background vocals. This, I’m pretty sure, is my favorite song here.
Zarni DeWet - Where I’m Gonna Go: I have to make sure I’m alone whenever I play this song. Without fail, within ten seconds or so, this song turns me into a blubbering, sobbing, useless mess. I mean, completely useless. I have to turn it off so I can write this. Yes, the piano is powerful and beautiful, your singing is beautiful, the picture you paint with your words in the song’s opening is just heart-aching, and the rest of your lyrics are so empowering... but moreso, this is a perfect storm of “it” factor. Objectively speaking, there are some flashier, “better” songs here, songs that I enjoy more even, but none of them manage to elicit such a profound emotional response in me, and as such, I have to grant the top spot to you.
Heather Miller - Fairfield: Out of all the U.S. residents submitting songs here, this one is alone in taking on a classic Americana vibe; you make the sort of case that would convince John Mellencamp to spend some time here. The song is jovial and affectionate, and so descriptive until you get to the chorus. On one hand, you’ve told me all about the town in your verses, but I can’t help but want to hear a little more than just, “that’s Fairfield”. The best example I can give is Ben Walker’s song - he treats the verse as exposition, and the chorus as an emotional conclusion, and I think that if this song had something similar, it would really pop. I really like the sound you got out of your guitar - every guitarist has their own “handwriting” in a sense; little nuances in strum patterns and the way you move on and off the fretboard between chords... all those little sounds work so well for this song. It really lends to that small-town, homey, Americana feeling that I can actually hear you playing your instrument as if I was catching it at a local show. I notice something in your vocals; you seem to spend a lot of time in a low register, but it sounds like you might be struggling a bit down there. When you hit your high notes your singing gets a fair bit stronger... I’m not sure exactly how to leverage this for future songs, but I suspect that singing in a higher range might do good things for you.
Steve Durand - In Paradise With You: Maybe it’s luck that you lived in a place where the local music is very distinctive, but I really appreciate that your song style itself is just rich with identity. On that alone, it leaves you with much less work to satisfy the challenge. And despite that, you give us great imagery of the island life and a sweet turn at the end as you dedicate it to your love. While this song isn’t likely to make it into heavy rotation on my ipod, it comes off as an authentic homage and is an absolute bullseye for this challenge.
SHADOW ENTRIES:
Duality - I Just Can’t Find A Virgin: The devil is a bluegrass yokel; who’d have known (besides Charlie Daniels, I mean)? I know that this is sort of a throwaway joke song, but its unrelenting silliness is so damn enjoyable. Your serious entry was beautiful, but I had a much better time listening to this one. The duet vocals dance around each other in a haphazardly (and yet deliberate) manner that I cannot get enough of. You’re a little crazy for writing two songs when everyone else here is struggling to get one good song in, but here you are showing versatility, talent, and a true passion for making music, no matter where it takes you. Thanks for this!
via Satellite - From Home: Oh, man. It’s a bummer that this didn’t make the deadline. I’ve heard some of your older work from Song Fu’s past, and I have to say, you’ve done some serious improving. I like everything about this song. The arrangement is very nicely layered, and the way you accelerate into the chorus is just delicious. I said it before; playing with tempo and time signatures, especially polyrhythms, is like catnip to me, and you guys wow me over and over again with the drum track. The clean guitars work really well to make this a plaintive song instead of an angry one, and the string accompaniment just expands the scope of the thing like any good goth song should. You have a neat thing going on with your voice where your tone is very pure, but you have a couple great scratchy phrases that liven things up a bit. You only approach the challenge criteria obliquely, this mainly being a personal song, but the good news is you aren’t losing any points for that. I’m glad you wrote the song you did and am eagerly awaiting your next shadow.
Bram Tant - Living In The Countryside: Bram. Dude. I would so rather have had you sign up and miss the deadline than not sign up and get this song in on time. If Zarni’s song was my #1 on “it” factor, then this is little acoustic piece is my #2. This is a great example of when a song doesn’t need a full arrangement to strike a heavy blow. This song needs nothing more. In fact, if we could get your vocals rerecorded with a studio mic, I’d have you release it as-is. You’ve written a song for people who like to pay attention. At face value it’s pretty and upbeat, and your vocal melody is charming (the way you made ‘Bachte-Maria-Leerne’ flow musically is spot-on perfect), but you’ve embedded some wicked satire that just makes me pump my fist and go, “YEAH, YOU TELL ‘EM, BRAM!” This was, despite its sparseness, one of my favorite songs of the round. Sign up next time.
-----------------------------
(Number represents how many points they got from Kevin.)
28 - Zarni DeWet
27 - Ryan “Ruff” Smith
26 - Gweebol
25 - Chris Cogott
24 - Mitchell Adam Johnson
23 - Ross Durand
22 - Ben Walker
21 - Edric Haleen
20 - Rebecca Brickley
19 - Brian Gray
18 - Inverse T. Clown
17 - Common Lisp
16 - Steve Durand
15 - Duality
14 - wait WHAT
13 - Danny Blackwell
12 - Charlie McCarron
11 - Governing Dynamics
10 - The Boffo Yux Dudes
9 - Heather Miller
8 - Ominous Ride
7 - Russ Rogers
6 - Charlie Wolf
5 - Austin Criswell
4 - JoAnn Abbott
3 - Emperor Gum
2 - Swatshots
1 - David Ritter
SpinTunes #2 Round 1 Review: Glen Phillips
Hello I’m glennny
How I judge:
After meeting the challenge at all, like a prerequisite, it’s all about the song. What is a song? In this paradigm it is the mp3 you submit. Therefore production matters in a big way. I’m spending 100 minutes each listen to this “album” (fight), about 15 full listens at this point= 25 hours over the last few days. If you spend 90 minutes on a piece of junk, that pisses me off. 90 minutes and it’s genius, then I’m jealous! Please don’t suck! Please submit things you’re proud of!
I’m a guitarist 1st, bass player 2nd, songwriter, then something like Mandolin player, banjo player, singer. I’m not a drummer, but firmly believe the drums are the most important part of a song. I studied music with Joyce Shannon (the same music teacher Frank Zappa had at Chaffey College). I love music theory, odd time signatures, harmonies, guitarmonies, counterpoint, key changes, mode changes, backing vocals. Being musically clever will go a long way with me.
My pet peeves: lyrical clichés, 12-bar blues chord patterns, plagiarism, fade-outs, meta-song violations, and timid vocals.
Spin Tunes #2 Round One: Hometown
Glennny’s judgemet:
31st place 1pt - David Ritter (Fired) - This isn’t total disregard for the challenge, but it’s close. Were the lyrics more about your hometown, this would be top 5 for me. There is excellent energy, and great playing. The song is pretty standard, and the lyrics are rather novelty, yet not very funny. I really appreciate the guitar solo! The production is nice. Those back-up harmonies are my favorite part. I appreciate the fact that you wrote a proper ending ! This rocks! I will keep this and enjoy it, but I don’t think you were playing the game. I’m pretty sure this will get the DQ. I’ll be sure to check out your songs once a week. I’m sure you’ve heard of my friend Jonathon Mann: http://songatron.com/ , he’s had this song-a-day thing going for quite a while now.
30th place 2pts - Swatshots (Level) - The drums were interesting a first. It went downhill from there. I don’t get your take on the challenge. I like the monster fart noise like at 3:01. The mp3 is sooooooo quiet. The “improve myself” line is painful in its delivery. What’s up with those pitchy chorus vocals?
29th place (Shadow) - Duality (I Just Can’t Find A Virgin) - Swimming in the novelty. The jokes fall flat. That flanger on the acoustic is incredibly annoying. The tambourine is gratuitous. The whole high end is well covered. My ears are desperately hungry for a bass line and a kick drum. Nothing new musically here, in fact it’s blue-grass paint by numbers. No thanks!
28th place 3pts - Ben Walker (Oxford) - I love the verse to this song. The production is excellent! Thank you, I was unsure my headphones were working properly. The low hum vocal is great! This would be my 2nd favorite song of the fight, were the chorus anywhere near as clever as the verse. Your vocals are wonderful! The faux organ is nice too! You shot straight to the bottom with the “Everybody Knows Your Name” allusion. It’s not funny. I’m wildly offended that you lifted that bit, copping out of writing a proper ending. I hope you survive, I’d like to hear more from you, but I can’t in good conscience rate this any higher with such an egregious offense. I also don’t think the “bubble wrap” or the “spring on your back” works at all. I’d rather you leave it as “Woah ooh Oh Oxford” then a musical lick or something. In general the words “it’s like a” I find weak. They are clearly syllable holders. Consequently you end up with an analogy rather than a metaphor. Everybody knows an analogy is poor poet’s metaphor. This song could really use a solo too!
27th place (Shadow) - via Satellite (From Home) - Big time genre bias here. I’m guessing there’s an admiration of Evanescence here. The production is way off here. That synth patch is really cheesy. The vocal melody really shoots this ranking down. That verse melody lacks much of a melody at all. The vocalist sounds frustrated, wanting to bust out. Long sustained monotone is tedious. I like the bass line. The drums are interesting, but the whole band is a mess. The ending clips also. Sounds like you needed a lot more time to work this out.
26th place 4pts - Ominous Ride (San Francisco) - This is very difficult to listen to. The flanger on the acoustic was a bad idea. Didn’t I say that to someone already? What the Hell is this a fashion thing? I like your vocal delivery. Is there a bass? I need more bass. You must live in the Sunset. The sun is in Potrero Hill. That drum pattern needs a lot of help too. The tripled vocals sounds good, is that real or an effect? These lyrics are pretty weak. San Francisco is another place I have called home. It’s about as rich a city for material as you can get. Yeah there is a name drop for Geary. Your song does not make me feel like I’m in San Francisco. Wow, I just listened to the version I was supposed to judge you on. You didn’t fix any of the glaring problems. Sounds like you balanced the vocals a bit more, ut you kept the incredibly annoying flange.
25th place 5pts - Heather Miller (Fairfield) - Yikes! Pitchy vocals. The acoustic sounds terrible. There are some excellent forums over on Song Fight that could drastically improve your sound. This drum machine is so tedious, I think you’d be better served keeping it as a click track for you to record to, but either spruce it up for the listener or cut it out. You did not need to repeat those lyrics! This would have been stronger as a 3 minute song. “Fairfield All the Way”? What does “Fairfeild all the Way !” mean? You have the conviction of a reluctant karaoke singer in this performance.
24th place 6pts - JoAnn Abbott (Not In Copiague) - This is way too long for a one voice a capella song. Even with the wide vibrato there are some sour notes. It’s naked and hissy, you’re brave. I like the descriptive lyrics, despite the list making. I don’t like the contemplative chorus; I don’t think it’s very insightful. Is that a cat I hear at 2:12? There are hesitations in this performance that make these lyrics sound like they are being read rather than the desired illusion of from the gut. Why have you come to trade the fiddle for the drum?
23rd place (Shadow) - Bram Tant (Living In The Country Side) - Not a bad track, but doesn’t sound like a song. This sounds like a demo. This is hard to listen to without bass and drums. The melody is nowhere near interesting enough to carry this sparseness. The mp3 you’ve submitted is rather grating. Your voice is fine. The lyrics are not doing anything for me. I like the refrain; it’s a much needed and nice change. Oh come on, at least be-box a drum fill. Something this sparse does not need a pause like that. I think the lyrics are pretty weak. The priest line is especially poor. So you can overdub a guitar solo (thank you) , but nothing resembling a bass line? This is wildly unfinished. This sounds like 90 minutes of work rather than the 11 days you had. You can keep time, and you have a descent voice , more time spent will pay off in the future.
22nd place 7pts - The Boffo Yux Dudes (Syracuse) - The downfall of this song is the doubled vocals. The doubled its are pitchy and loose. One voice would have served this song much better. I really like the synth solo. These vocals are sooo in front. They need to sit back deeper in the mix. Challenge met. Those chessy synth licks crack me up.
21st place 8pts - Inverse T Clown (Salem) - The drum machine is terrible. Ughhhhh! a freaking story. A boring story at that. This is so cheesy. This does not rock. This does not make me laugh. This is like the new wave nerdy little brother to “Devil went Down to Georgia”. It’s more narrated than sung.
20th place 9pts - Eric Haleen (Lansing Michigan) - I hate meta-song violations. The 1st 37 seconds brings this way down. Nice singing! The sports update is so hammy. This might be funny with better timing. I suppose it is genre appropriate to spoon feed the joke, but the laugh is sacrificed. The challenge is nailed!
19th place 10pts - Common Lisp (Leaving Ann Arbor) - Ouch. Painful rhymes. I get it, that’s the joke, but I’m not laughing. Ah a change up! BTW I’d kill for a $250K house, triple that for San Francisco Bay area prices. I like the lazy acoustic riff. I don’t care for the vocals. The overly cheeky affectation is not fun. You met the challenge very well, it’s just a tough song to get into or care about much. I should say good production! At least I’m not distracted by production issues and can focus on the song and performance. At least the bridge has some life, but I don’t care for it either.
18th place 11pts - Rebecca Brickley (Here) - You have an incredible voice. Nice melodies, though they drift into cheese land a lot. Thank you for a nice kick! The drums work well. The piano bass isn’t quite bassy enough for my tastes, but well enough for this crowd. This would place top 5 had you written a song about your hometown, rather than “when you were young”. What effects are on your voice? There’s a robotic glisten like unto auto-tune, perhaps it’s just unfortunate compression and chorus. Anyway, I think you can leave your voice a bit more naked (personal preference). By the way, excellent piano playing! Yeah I actively dislike these lyrics, but I like the melody, singing and playing. Once I paid attention to your lyrics, you shot straight to the bottom of my list, I tried to keep you down there, for such lyrical cheese, but you’re way too musical to keep down. Damn these lyrical challenges! The lyrics are riddle with cliché’s, this was a super easy challenge, why were these lyrics so important? I hope you survive; I’d love to hear more of your voice.
17th place 12pts - Wait WHAT (LBC) - You’re bad luck is that I lived in LBC in 1995. I lived in Belmont Shore. I find it amazing you can write a song about Long Beach and completely ignore the Grunion. Nobody warned me when I moved there; I was shocked to say the least. I’m sad there are no props to the Shorehouse café either. Anyway, back to your song. The lazy strummy song is pleasant enough. You really embraced the challenge. It feels a bit like Wikipedia lyrics. The vocals are nice enough. The melody and vibe is way too “Anyone Else but You” by Moldy Peaches for me to think this very original. What elevates this to where it is, is some nice harmonica playing and a tasty solo. Sounds like you couldn’t think of enough stuff about your HOMETOWN and consulted Wikipedia for some fun facts. At least you mentioned 2nd street.
16th place 13pts - Russ Rogers (St. Michael) - Easily worst recording of the bunch. Is that cassette recorder? The song is nice. It’s very tough to listen to with this horrible hiss, and clippy guitar. The whistling was a bad idea. I like your voice. Hey mall rhymes with small! These lyrics are really weak. Your vocals are good enough to make me think they are meaningful until I read them. Seriously man $300 and you could sound better than most of these entries. $100 microphone, $75 software, $125 USB 2.0 interface. If you ever want to seriously submit a demo for any reason…. WTF? I just read your profile, 20 years a musician? That explains the excellent sense of songwriting, great singing, but it is baffling you could get anywhere with a demo as crappy sounding as this. Are you in prison? Man that would be so cool if you were competing from prison!
15th place 14pts - Brian Gray (South Bend Aid) - At first I was a bit miffed at the Motley Crue inspired piano , then I remembered that song is “Home Sweet Home”, made me chuckle. Thank for avoiding the direct rip off. SO this is quite a big devotion to the “give us money” , and “we’re no St. Louis” jokes. This song is terrible, but it seems self aware of such. The production is great, and the vocals are excellent. I laughed at the “there’s no more Toblerones” . You can certainly write a song. If wrote you wrote a song you cared about, I might care too. Topped off with cheesy hand claps! Challenge met.
14th place 15pts - Emporer Gum (Cheltenham) - This would be my number one song to cover of the lot. I think the writing is great, and I think the recording is terrible, thus making it the ripest for a cover. The writing is not without issues. I just love the musical melodies and the riffs. You have GOT to do something about the pop-screen factor. $40 for the nice metal pop screen, $20 for the cheap mesh pop-screen, $3 for the panty-hose stretched across the coat hanger. Those P’s are painfully poppy. The instrumentation is very nice. You just have some major recording issues. There are some timing issues, but they are subtle. The doubled vocals make the vocals sound worse. If they are going to be unison, they ought to e a lot tighter. I love the image you paint with the lyrics, but I hate how nothing happens to the characters. Too many words for my taste.
13th place 16pts - Charlie Wolf (I Love LA) - Hey cool bass lick. Turn up the bass! The acoustic is not very interesting, but it is played well, there are some minor hesitations and chair squeaks that makes this feel live. I too love LA. It was smart to end this at 2:01. That’s all the song that is there. It’s also kind to the judges, thank you! The nervous shy affectation in the vocals works for this song, but I hope it’s not for every one of your songs. This reminds me of Mark Kozelek. I assume you’re a Red House Painters fan. Nice little ditty!
12th place 17pts - Danny Blackwell (A Song About Woodsetts) - This is very quiet. This is sloppy, however it does sound like one take where you played guitar and sang at the same time. Nice dynamics. I like the free tea and biscuits line. Challenge is met nicely. Well done, I hope there’s more than just G n G to come from you. I like your Ray Davies accent too!
11th place 18pts - Governing Dynamics (Stars Over Avalon) -Nice atmosphere created. I never thought I’d be so happy to hear a drum fill. The drums sound nice. The weakest link is the vocal melody. The performance sounds a bit strained and unsure at points. I dig the guitar solo! Those wicked vibrato notes at 3:06 is the best part of the song. The guitar has got some killer passion in it, and your vocals stay in that reluctant , do I really have to sing mood. I think amping up the vocal intensity at strategic points would vastly improve this song.
10th place 19pts - Duality (To The End Of The World) - You must drive drummers crazy with the tempo fluctuations. I like the piano playing despite the G at 2:10. It sounds like a mistake to me, but to your credit you take it in stride and sell it as intentional. That was nitpicking, there’s some really cool things going on with the chord pattern. I like this song a lot. The 6/8 arpeggio could be perhaps changed up to improve this. I also think the doubled vocal detracts more than it adds during the refrain. The sibilance ricochets rather unpleasantly. A few of you could really stand to Z up your S’s so the sibilance was at a minimum. This isn’t a very catchy song, but I really like the listen.
9th place 20pts - Gweebol (Darktown) - I hate your drummer. Why the roll, for nearly every measure? This could use some far more interesting drums and keys. I suppose they are laid back to allow the vocals to shine. Holy Crap, fantastic vocals! Wonderful melodies with beautiful dynamics and range. The waltz doesn’t serve this song very well. Different drums and some existent bass would make this an awesome song. This is a good song with excellent backing vocals, which pleasantly surprised me when they entered. I really like the lyrics. Nice take on the challenge!
8th place 21pts - Charlie McCarron (Stillwater MN Air) - You sing with 2 voices. Your deeper voice I like a lot, the head voice is almost begging for mockery. However, the intonation for both voices as well as the harmonies is spot on. I like the sprinkled high chords atop the arpeggios musically. It’s a very pretty piano line! That head voice is something Jeff Buckley did masterfully; you’re damn good at it too. There are no drums, but the cymbal player from the local symphony stopped by for percussion. The take on the challenge is excellent, both musically and lyrically. Well done!
7th place 22pts - Austin Criswell (Mount Holly) - I’m surprised something this simple ranks this high. Pretty much all your choices work well. Your voice is dynamic and passionate enough to fill the space left by the sparse guitar. Nice choice on reverb too, especially for the situation. The lyrics are nice; they barely meet the challenge in my opinion. I know next to nothing about Mount Holly from this song. The acoustic is played well, and has it’s dynamics appropriate for the song. Good job, I’d embrace the challenge more in future rounds if I were you. Great song!
6th place 23pts - Steve Durand (In Paradise With You) - Nice to hear a familiar voice in this here Spin tunes land. I’m a fan of your music. I’m very impressed you can make such a cool song without going to what you’re famous for. I really like the slide guitar. Your vocals are sweet, the harmonies are also done well! The only thing I don’t like is the tone of that acoustic. You should pick Ross’s brain for how to get his acoustic sound. For that matter I need to pick his brain about getting an acoustic to sound so good. Anyway, great song Steve, I hope we get to hear some horns in future rounds!
5th place 24pts - Zarni De Wet (Where I’m Gonna Go) - Hot damn! Excellent performance both piano and vocal! I love that you sing like a singer! I love the Whohs and the “gonna gonna go oohh oh oh”s. This works well with piano only. I can hear a band backing this up and taking it even higher. There are some production issues. Your vocal microphone is super hot so we can hear you lick your lips and breathe in and out, which is all fine (usually clouded by a drummers cymbals), but there’s some strange silence that spikes up to white noise whenever you sing. Sounds like not so subtle limiting. The piano could stand to be louder in the mix. You’ll only take the drama so far with vocals and piano, imagining this with the right drums and bass, this would be my favorite. Well done! I’m excited to hear your next entry!
4th place 25pts - Ross Durand (From There) - What is this crazy place where everyone has a different title for their song? I love the acoustic sound you get! You really embraced the challenge. You have one of the best takes on the challenge. I get a feel for Thousand Oaks, you have some clever lines in there. Great singing, excellent production! The harmonica is pretty cool! No complaints, just varying degrees of praise. RD classic!
3rd place 26pts - Mitchell Adam Johnson (London) - There is only one problem with this otherwise perfect pop song. That damn 1991 99.9F Suzanne Vega megaphone effect. I’m so freaking tired of it at this point. It is unnecessary. On to the good stuff. I LOVE the backing vocals! The production is great. Probably could use more restraint on the tambourine. The drums are tasty. The lead vocals are great. The piano is perfect for the song, and probably has the best licks. What a catchy melody! Nice hook for the chorus. That is the perfect way to do a bridge with the dynamic shift. This conjures up mid 90’s- 60’s retro. Especially the Cardigans. The vocals: timbre and melody, remind me heavily of Echobelly. I bet you guys do a killer cover of “King of the Kerb”. Oh yeah, Okay two problems, the 2nd being the fade out. Come on, you can write an ending. A fade out is a cop out. In any case this song is a gem, and a keeper that I will be listening to for years to come. Thank you!
2nd place 27pts - Ryan “Ruff” Smith (Golden Valley Sunday) - If I were to change anything it’d be the drummer. I like that they are sparse, which fits the song, but a few gentle cymbal fills would go a long way. This reminds me of when Bikeride would go a little jazz. Great chord pattern! Excellent portrait of a place! I adore the Wes Montgomery octave guitar solo. The backing vocals are hilarious and beautiful! This whole thing is gorgeous! Excellent ending too! Vocals are great and the melody sticks with me when I’m away from all these songs. I’m very curious to hear your next entry! Awesome!
1st place 28pts - Chris Cogott (Fairfield) - Fucking perfect! Haven’t been this blown away by a song since Paco del Stinko stopped recording. Great riff! That is great opening riff, verse riff, counter riff, bass licks, chorus riff etc! backing vocals are Awesome. You know, I really thought it’s be BSS vs. you in Nur Ein a few months ago, and we were afraid. When you’re on, you’re awesome! This was without a doubt the clear winner. I love the lyrics, I know Fairfield, you nailed it. I’ve listened to all of these songs about 15 times each. However to “cleanse my pallet” so to speak, when another song was particularly annoying or boring, I’d find this Fairfield song and rock out a bit. I bet I have between 30 and 40 listens at this point. It’s a great song Chris! It makes me want to shoot a video for it. If only I had the time. Good job!
How I judge:
After meeting the challenge at all, like a prerequisite, it’s all about the song. What is a song? In this paradigm it is the mp3 you submit. Therefore production matters in a big way. I’m spending 100 minutes each listen to this “album” (fight), about 15 full listens at this point= 25 hours over the last few days. If you spend 90 minutes on a piece of junk, that pisses me off. 90 minutes and it’s genius, then I’m jealous! Please don’t suck! Please submit things you’re proud of!
I’m a guitarist 1st, bass player 2nd, songwriter, then something like Mandolin player, banjo player, singer. I’m not a drummer, but firmly believe the drums are the most important part of a song. I studied music with Joyce Shannon (the same music teacher Frank Zappa had at Chaffey College). I love music theory, odd time signatures, harmonies, guitarmonies, counterpoint, key changes, mode changes, backing vocals. Being musically clever will go a long way with me.
My pet peeves: lyrical clichés, 12-bar blues chord patterns, plagiarism, fade-outs, meta-song violations, and timid vocals.
Spin Tunes #2 Round One: Hometown
Glennny’s judgemet:
31st place 1pt - David Ritter (Fired) - This isn’t total disregard for the challenge, but it’s close. Were the lyrics more about your hometown, this would be top 5 for me. There is excellent energy, and great playing. The song is pretty standard, and the lyrics are rather novelty, yet not very funny. I really appreciate the guitar solo! The production is nice. Those back-up harmonies are my favorite part. I appreciate the fact that you wrote a proper ending ! This rocks! I will keep this and enjoy it, but I don’t think you were playing the game. I’m pretty sure this will get the DQ. I’ll be sure to check out your songs once a week. I’m sure you’ve heard of my friend Jonathon Mann: http://songatron.com/ , he’s had this song-a-day thing going for quite a while now.
30th place 2pts - Swatshots (Level) - The drums were interesting a first. It went downhill from there. I don’t get your take on the challenge. I like the monster fart noise like at 3:01. The mp3 is sooooooo quiet. The “improve myself” line is painful in its delivery. What’s up with those pitchy chorus vocals?
29th place (Shadow) - Duality (I Just Can’t Find A Virgin) - Swimming in the novelty. The jokes fall flat. That flanger on the acoustic is incredibly annoying. The tambourine is gratuitous. The whole high end is well covered. My ears are desperately hungry for a bass line and a kick drum. Nothing new musically here, in fact it’s blue-grass paint by numbers. No thanks!
28th place 3pts - Ben Walker (Oxford) - I love the verse to this song. The production is excellent! Thank you, I was unsure my headphones were working properly. The low hum vocal is great! This would be my 2nd favorite song of the fight, were the chorus anywhere near as clever as the verse. Your vocals are wonderful! The faux organ is nice too! You shot straight to the bottom with the “Everybody Knows Your Name” allusion. It’s not funny. I’m wildly offended that you lifted that bit, copping out of writing a proper ending. I hope you survive, I’d like to hear more from you, but I can’t in good conscience rate this any higher with such an egregious offense. I also don’t think the “bubble wrap” or the “spring on your back” works at all. I’d rather you leave it as “Woah ooh Oh Oxford” then a musical lick or something. In general the words “it’s like a” I find weak. They are clearly syllable holders. Consequently you end up with an analogy rather than a metaphor. Everybody knows an analogy is poor poet’s metaphor. This song could really use a solo too!
27th place (Shadow) - via Satellite (From Home) - Big time genre bias here. I’m guessing there’s an admiration of Evanescence here. The production is way off here. That synth patch is really cheesy. The vocal melody really shoots this ranking down. That verse melody lacks much of a melody at all. The vocalist sounds frustrated, wanting to bust out. Long sustained monotone is tedious. I like the bass line. The drums are interesting, but the whole band is a mess. The ending clips also. Sounds like you needed a lot more time to work this out.
26th place 4pts - Ominous Ride (San Francisco) - This is very difficult to listen to. The flanger on the acoustic was a bad idea. Didn’t I say that to someone already? What the Hell is this a fashion thing? I like your vocal delivery. Is there a bass? I need more bass. You must live in the Sunset. The sun is in Potrero Hill. That drum pattern needs a lot of help too. The tripled vocals sounds good, is that real or an effect? These lyrics are pretty weak. San Francisco is another place I have called home. It’s about as rich a city for material as you can get. Yeah there is a name drop for Geary. Your song does not make me feel like I’m in San Francisco. Wow, I just listened to the version I was supposed to judge you on. You didn’t fix any of the glaring problems. Sounds like you balanced the vocals a bit more, ut you kept the incredibly annoying flange.
25th place 5pts - Heather Miller (Fairfield) - Yikes! Pitchy vocals. The acoustic sounds terrible. There are some excellent forums over on Song Fight that could drastically improve your sound. This drum machine is so tedious, I think you’d be better served keeping it as a click track for you to record to, but either spruce it up for the listener or cut it out. You did not need to repeat those lyrics! This would have been stronger as a 3 minute song. “Fairfield All the Way”? What does “Fairfeild all the Way !” mean? You have the conviction of a reluctant karaoke singer in this performance.
24th place 6pts - JoAnn Abbott (Not In Copiague) - This is way too long for a one voice a capella song. Even with the wide vibrato there are some sour notes. It’s naked and hissy, you’re brave. I like the descriptive lyrics, despite the list making. I don’t like the contemplative chorus; I don’t think it’s very insightful. Is that a cat I hear at 2:12? There are hesitations in this performance that make these lyrics sound like they are being read rather than the desired illusion of from the gut. Why have you come to trade the fiddle for the drum?
23rd place (Shadow) - Bram Tant (Living In The Country Side) - Not a bad track, but doesn’t sound like a song. This sounds like a demo. This is hard to listen to without bass and drums. The melody is nowhere near interesting enough to carry this sparseness. The mp3 you’ve submitted is rather grating. Your voice is fine. The lyrics are not doing anything for me. I like the refrain; it’s a much needed and nice change. Oh come on, at least be-box a drum fill. Something this sparse does not need a pause like that. I think the lyrics are pretty weak. The priest line is especially poor. So you can overdub a guitar solo (thank you) , but nothing resembling a bass line? This is wildly unfinished. This sounds like 90 minutes of work rather than the 11 days you had. You can keep time, and you have a descent voice , more time spent will pay off in the future.
22nd place 7pts - The Boffo Yux Dudes (Syracuse) - The downfall of this song is the doubled vocals. The doubled its are pitchy and loose. One voice would have served this song much better. I really like the synth solo. These vocals are sooo in front. They need to sit back deeper in the mix. Challenge met. Those chessy synth licks crack me up.
21st place 8pts - Inverse T Clown (Salem) - The drum machine is terrible. Ughhhhh! a freaking story. A boring story at that. This is so cheesy. This does not rock. This does not make me laugh. This is like the new wave nerdy little brother to “Devil went Down to Georgia”. It’s more narrated than sung.
20th place 9pts - Eric Haleen (Lansing Michigan) - I hate meta-song violations. The 1st 37 seconds brings this way down. Nice singing! The sports update is so hammy. This might be funny with better timing. I suppose it is genre appropriate to spoon feed the joke, but the laugh is sacrificed. The challenge is nailed!
19th place 10pts - Common Lisp (Leaving Ann Arbor) - Ouch. Painful rhymes. I get it, that’s the joke, but I’m not laughing. Ah a change up! BTW I’d kill for a $250K house, triple that for San Francisco Bay area prices. I like the lazy acoustic riff. I don’t care for the vocals. The overly cheeky affectation is not fun. You met the challenge very well, it’s just a tough song to get into or care about much. I should say good production! At least I’m not distracted by production issues and can focus on the song and performance. At least the bridge has some life, but I don’t care for it either.
18th place 11pts - Rebecca Brickley (Here) - You have an incredible voice. Nice melodies, though they drift into cheese land a lot. Thank you for a nice kick! The drums work well. The piano bass isn’t quite bassy enough for my tastes, but well enough for this crowd. This would place top 5 had you written a song about your hometown, rather than “when you were young”. What effects are on your voice? There’s a robotic glisten like unto auto-tune, perhaps it’s just unfortunate compression and chorus. Anyway, I think you can leave your voice a bit more naked (personal preference). By the way, excellent piano playing! Yeah I actively dislike these lyrics, but I like the melody, singing and playing. Once I paid attention to your lyrics, you shot straight to the bottom of my list, I tried to keep you down there, for such lyrical cheese, but you’re way too musical to keep down. Damn these lyrical challenges! The lyrics are riddle with cliché’s, this was a super easy challenge, why were these lyrics so important? I hope you survive; I’d love to hear more of your voice.
17th place 12pts - Wait WHAT (LBC) - You’re bad luck is that I lived in LBC in 1995. I lived in Belmont Shore. I find it amazing you can write a song about Long Beach and completely ignore the Grunion. Nobody warned me when I moved there; I was shocked to say the least. I’m sad there are no props to the Shorehouse café either. Anyway, back to your song. The lazy strummy song is pleasant enough. You really embraced the challenge. It feels a bit like Wikipedia lyrics. The vocals are nice enough. The melody and vibe is way too “Anyone Else but You” by Moldy Peaches for me to think this very original. What elevates this to where it is, is some nice harmonica playing and a tasty solo. Sounds like you couldn’t think of enough stuff about your HOMETOWN and consulted Wikipedia for some fun facts. At least you mentioned 2nd street.
16th place 13pts - Russ Rogers (St. Michael) - Easily worst recording of the bunch. Is that cassette recorder? The song is nice. It’s very tough to listen to with this horrible hiss, and clippy guitar. The whistling was a bad idea. I like your voice. Hey mall rhymes with small! These lyrics are really weak. Your vocals are good enough to make me think they are meaningful until I read them. Seriously man $300 and you could sound better than most of these entries. $100 microphone, $75 software, $125 USB 2.0 interface. If you ever want to seriously submit a demo for any reason…. WTF? I just read your profile, 20 years a musician? That explains the excellent sense of songwriting, great singing, but it is baffling you could get anywhere with a demo as crappy sounding as this. Are you in prison? Man that would be so cool if you were competing from prison!
15th place 14pts - Brian Gray (South Bend Aid) - At first I was a bit miffed at the Motley Crue inspired piano , then I remembered that song is “Home Sweet Home”, made me chuckle. Thank for avoiding the direct rip off. SO this is quite a big devotion to the “give us money” , and “we’re no St. Louis” jokes. This song is terrible, but it seems self aware of such. The production is great, and the vocals are excellent. I laughed at the “there’s no more Toblerones” . You can certainly write a song. If wrote you wrote a song you cared about, I might care too. Topped off with cheesy hand claps! Challenge met.
14th place 15pts - Emporer Gum (Cheltenham) - This would be my number one song to cover of the lot. I think the writing is great, and I think the recording is terrible, thus making it the ripest for a cover. The writing is not without issues. I just love the musical melodies and the riffs. You have GOT to do something about the pop-screen factor. $40 for the nice metal pop screen, $20 for the cheap mesh pop-screen, $3 for the panty-hose stretched across the coat hanger. Those P’s are painfully poppy. The instrumentation is very nice. You just have some major recording issues. There are some timing issues, but they are subtle. The doubled vocals make the vocals sound worse. If they are going to be unison, they ought to e a lot tighter. I love the image you paint with the lyrics, but I hate how nothing happens to the characters. Too many words for my taste.
13th place 16pts - Charlie Wolf (I Love LA) - Hey cool bass lick. Turn up the bass! The acoustic is not very interesting, but it is played well, there are some minor hesitations and chair squeaks that makes this feel live. I too love LA. It was smart to end this at 2:01. That’s all the song that is there. It’s also kind to the judges, thank you! The nervous shy affectation in the vocals works for this song, but I hope it’s not for every one of your songs. This reminds me of Mark Kozelek. I assume you’re a Red House Painters fan. Nice little ditty!
12th place 17pts - Danny Blackwell (A Song About Woodsetts) - This is very quiet. This is sloppy, however it does sound like one take where you played guitar and sang at the same time. Nice dynamics. I like the free tea and biscuits line. Challenge is met nicely. Well done, I hope there’s more than just G n G to come from you. I like your Ray Davies accent too!
11th place 18pts - Governing Dynamics (Stars Over Avalon) -Nice atmosphere created. I never thought I’d be so happy to hear a drum fill. The drums sound nice. The weakest link is the vocal melody. The performance sounds a bit strained and unsure at points. I dig the guitar solo! Those wicked vibrato notes at 3:06 is the best part of the song. The guitar has got some killer passion in it, and your vocals stay in that reluctant , do I really have to sing mood. I think amping up the vocal intensity at strategic points would vastly improve this song.
10th place 19pts - Duality (To The End Of The World) - You must drive drummers crazy with the tempo fluctuations. I like the piano playing despite the G at 2:10. It sounds like a mistake to me, but to your credit you take it in stride and sell it as intentional. That was nitpicking, there’s some really cool things going on with the chord pattern. I like this song a lot. The 6/8 arpeggio could be perhaps changed up to improve this. I also think the doubled vocal detracts more than it adds during the refrain. The sibilance ricochets rather unpleasantly. A few of you could really stand to Z up your S’s so the sibilance was at a minimum. This isn’t a very catchy song, but I really like the listen.
9th place 20pts - Gweebol (Darktown) - I hate your drummer. Why the roll, for nearly every measure? This could use some far more interesting drums and keys. I suppose they are laid back to allow the vocals to shine. Holy Crap, fantastic vocals! Wonderful melodies with beautiful dynamics and range. The waltz doesn’t serve this song very well. Different drums and some existent bass would make this an awesome song. This is a good song with excellent backing vocals, which pleasantly surprised me when they entered. I really like the lyrics. Nice take on the challenge!
8th place 21pts - Charlie McCarron (Stillwater MN Air) - You sing with 2 voices. Your deeper voice I like a lot, the head voice is almost begging for mockery. However, the intonation for both voices as well as the harmonies is spot on. I like the sprinkled high chords atop the arpeggios musically. It’s a very pretty piano line! That head voice is something Jeff Buckley did masterfully; you’re damn good at it too. There are no drums, but the cymbal player from the local symphony stopped by for percussion. The take on the challenge is excellent, both musically and lyrically. Well done!
7th place 22pts - Austin Criswell (Mount Holly) - I’m surprised something this simple ranks this high. Pretty much all your choices work well. Your voice is dynamic and passionate enough to fill the space left by the sparse guitar. Nice choice on reverb too, especially for the situation. The lyrics are nice; they barely meet the challenge in my opinion. I know next to nothing about Mount Holly from this song. The acoustic is played well, and has it’s dynamics appropriate for the song. Good job, I’d embrace the challenge more in future rounds if I were you. Great song!
6th place 23pts - Steve Durand (In Paradise With You) - Nice to hear a familiar voice in this here Spin tunes land. I’m a fan of your music. I’m very impressed you can make such a cool song without going to what you’re famous for. I really like the slide guitar. Your vocals are sweet, the harmonies are also done well! The only thing I don’t like is the tone of that acoustic. You should pick Ross’s brain for how to get his acoustic sound. For that matter I need to pick his brain about getting an acoustic to sound so good. Anyway, great song Steve, I hope we get to hear some horns in future rounds!
5th place 24pts - Zarni De Wet (Where I’m Gonna Go) - Hot damn! Excellent performance both piano and vocal! I love that you sing like a singer! I love the Whohs and the “gonna gonna go oohh oh oh”s. This works well with piano only. I can hear a band backing this up and taking it even higher. There are some production issues. Your vocal microphone is super hot so we can hear you lick your lips and breathe in and out, which is all fine (usually clouded by a drummers cymbals), but there’s some strange silence that spikes up to white noise whenever you sing. Sounds like not so subtle limiting. The piano could stand to be louder in the mix. You’ll only take the drama so far with vocals and piano, imagining this with the right drums and bass, this would be my favorite. Well done! I’m excited to hear your next entry!
4th place 25pts - Ross Durand (From There) - What is this crazy place where everyone has a different title for their song? I love the acoustic sound you get! You really embraced the challenge. You have one of the best takes on the challenge. I get a feel for Thousand Oaks, you have some clever lines in there. Great singing, excellent production! The harmonica is pretty cool! No complaints, just varying degrees of praise. RD classic!
3rd place 26pts - Mitchell Adam Johnson (London) - There is only one problem with this otherwise perfect pop song. That damn 1991 99.9F Suzanne Vega megaphone effect. I’m so freaking tired of it at this point. It is unnecessary. On to the good stuff. I LOVE the backing vocals! The production is great. Probably could use more restraint on the tambourine. The drums are tasty. The lead vocals are great. The piano is perfect for the song, and probably has the best licks. What a catchy melody! Nice hook for the chorus. That is the perfect way to do a bridge with the dynamic shift. This conjures up mid 90’s- 60’s retro. Especially the Cardigans. The vocals: timbre and melody, remind me heavily of Echobelly. I bet you guys do a killer cover of “King of the Kerb”. Oh yeah, Okay two problems, the 2nd being the fade out. Come on, you can write an ending. A fade out is a cop out. In any case this song is a gem, and a keeper that I will be listening to for years to come. Thank you!
2nd place 27pts - Ryan “Ruff” Smith (Golden Valley Sunday) - If I were to change anything it’d be the drummer. I like that they are sparse, which fits the song, but a few gentle cymbal fills would go a long way. This reminds me of when Bikeride would go a little jazz. Great chord pattern! Excellent portrait of a place! I adore the Wes Montgomery octave guitar solo. The backing vocals are hilarious and beautiful! This whole thing is gorgeous! Excellent ending too! Vocals are great and the melody sticks with me when I’m away from all these songs. I’m very curious to hear your next entry! Awesome!
1st place 28pts - Chris Cogott (Fairfield) - Fucking perfect! Haven’t been this blown away by a song since Paco del Stinko stopped recording. Great riff! That is great opening riff, verse riff, counter riff, bass licks, chorus riff etc! backing vocals are Awesome. You know, I really thought it’s be BSS vs. you in Nur Ein a few months ago, and we were afraid. When you’re on, you’re awesome! This was without a doubt the clear winner. I love the lyrics, I know Fairfield, you nailed it. I’ve listened to all of these songs about 15 times each. However to “cleanse my pallet” so to speak, when another song was particularly annoying or boring, I’d find this Fairfield song and rock out a bit. I bet I have between 30 and 40 listens at this point. It’s a great song Chris! It makes me want to shoot a video for it. If only I had the time. Good job!
SpinTunes #2 Round 1 Review: Dr. Lindyke
OK, after my in-retrospect-ill-advised ribbing of the judges in the first SpinTunes competition, it's my turn to be your "fair and unbalanced" jurist. And wouldn't you know it, I have a really amazing competition to judge! If you were around in the last competition and were unfortunate enough to stumble across my blog, you might understand something of the way I think; for those that didn't, here's my thought process:
First, the challenge is paramount. You can write the best song in the world, but if it didn't meet the challenge, then I'm sorry. I mean I'm really sorry; I will well and truly weep as I move you to the bottom of the list. Crashing and burning in style is still crashing and burning; so if you do nothing else, make sure you meet the challenge unambiguously. Also remember that the challenge was given to you for a reason. This is the "Iron Chef" of music competitions. It's not enough to write just a great song; you also have to meet the challenge better than the other challengers.
Second, I see this as a songwriting competition: it's not a battle of the bands. So you've got a pretty clear shot even if your rhythm section is a metronome and your face is on milk cartons printed by Auto-Tune. I have no problem filling in (in my head) entire missing arrangements, so long as your intent is clear. That said, don't be surprised if people who can fully produce a song are also capable of writing kick-ass songs... and obviously, their intent doesn't have to be guessed at. They do have an edge.
Finally, keep in mind that I'm judging the songs. I'm not judging you, or your potential. You may have greatness in you, and may simply be stumped by a specific challenge. Nevertheless, I have to go by the song. In scoring, factors include the challenge, emotional impact, the lyric, the tune, technical factors, and je ne sais quoi. It's not a scientific formula, so I'll be astounded if anyone agrees with all of my choices.
In this particular challenge, you were asked to write a song about your hometown. You should have included the name of the place in the lyrics; and it should have been a place where you have roots, which means to me a definite place. No one's hometown is a fictional place, so in good conscience I have to score real places much higher than imaginary ones, or imaginary versions of real places(*). And for this challenge, I'm giving a lot of credit for songs that allow me to draw a mental picture of your hometown. The more descriptive, the better. I want to know what it feels like. There are so many great entries that I can afford to be picky, and that's where I choose to draw my lines.
* So did I track down these locations? Well... yeah, I did. Not for any rules compliance... we had already concluded that we really couldn't verify what is or isn't your hometown... you could pretty much pick any place you wanted. Take it as a compliment that you folks instilled enough curiosity in at least one judge to go check out the great places you were writing about. I was hoping that this challenge would yield a musical world tour compiled by the most creative minds we could muster. You folks did not disappoint. You have done a fantastic job, and I am not worthy to tune your instruments. Be proud.
Now, on to the reviews...
Governing Dynamics (Stars Over Avalon) - We begin with a coveted no-prize for "Best Title", hands down. Hell, it's a gorgeous title. And the song matches it. Sure, this is a competition, but songwriting isn't all about energy. It's also about creating and communicating a mood, and not every mood is "get up and dance". What I like here is the way Travis has painted this picture in sound using shades of vivid Blues. It's a sleepy, laid-back tune for a sleepy town, and immensely descriptive. I'm also pleased that Travis manages to get through the bridge and instrumental with sufficient variety, yet without shattering the mood by shifting into high energy. This song was the perfect storm for me... I listened at the right time of day and in the right frame of mind to fully appreciate it, and it's carried over to subsequent listenings. This is an artistic piece all around, and I'm diggin' the ebow. The weakest part is Travis' vocals. To me that's a quibble, but I can't help thinking that if Travis Norris and Austin Criswell were ever to join forces they would be formidable indeed. Despite the shaky vocals, I love the song, and I have a soft spot for small towns. You're free to disagree, but I'm giving top marks this round to Governing Dynamics. 28 points. (Dave goes into detail about this song on his blog.)
Zarni DeWet (Where I'm Gonna Go) - Wow, what economy of words! I'm not writing these individual critiques in the order you're going to read them. Elsewhere you'll hear me write about how a song needs 'more of the town', which in many cases means more lyrics devoted to description. Not here. With a few short lines I can see the houses of Durban, and I know why those poor men are rich. Three cities, three verses, and for each, a single line that tells you without a doubt why it's home. The repetition of "That's where I'm gonna go gonna gonna go" gives that assertion a sense of eagerness. This is, without a doubt, the most emotionally powerful song on the entire playlist. I visited three cities in South Africa via Google Streetview thanks to this song. The weak point here is, perhaps ironically, the same. This hometown song, being spread over three cities, doesn't allow Zarni to engage in the depth of description we hear in "Stars Over Avalon". We do, however, hear allusions to a personal journey that, coupled with her strong performance, lands her in second place.
Ominous Ride (San Francisco) - Great hippy groove! I've been to San Francisco and I couldn't find the sun, either. I thought it was just a bad day. The groove alone gets this song extra points, as it evokes the 60's, free love, and the feel of vintage San Francisco. That's before you listen to a single word. Then the lyrics drive home the fact that this song could be about no place else on this Earth. This is how it's done, folks!
Mitchell Adam Johnson (London) - I LOVE THIS! SO SIXTIES! I can just see the mini-skirts in bold geometric print. It's a killer tune, and I could listen to it all day, every day. Here's why this song is not heading this list: you can replace "London" with "Marvin" and do nothing else, and this song still works, even with the offhand references in the bridge. That's a very weak association, making it hard to say that it's a song "about London". If Mitchell had handed us a song that you can't shake the London out of, then he would easily have had my top spot.
Ben Walker (Oxford) - I spent a lot of time in Oxford during the five years I lived in the Midlands. It's a unique city where ancient charm meets modern erudition, and the minds of children play dress-up with adult ideas. Ben has captured it perfectly, right down to the late night pickled eggs. This is a song bound to Oxford and nowhere else. The tango in the bridge had me smiling... a great change of pace. Now the bad: I didn't like the "Cheers" homage. I thought it was entirely unnecessary and distracting. After painting this lovely picture of Oxford, Ben covers it over with Bostonian whitewash. It's like cleansing your palate with peppermint mouthwash between wine tastings. I would unreservedly love this song if that weren't in it.
Ross Durand (From There) - This is a really strong entry. This feels like a movie soundtrack, and Ross performs a neat trick here: although the lyrics are totally descriptive of an idealized Thousand Oaks, as I listen my mind plays out scenes of dusty roads and a lone hitchhiker, travel-weary and dreaming of home. Ross' distinctive voice and style really sell the imagery. This town is only a figurative stone's throw from Long Beach, but the contrast between this entry and and "LBC" couldn't be starker. What a difference 60 miles makes!
Edric Haleen (Lansing Michigan) - I seem to recall that prior to its unveiling, Edric nominated his song as most likely to suck seed. No! Wait! It was most likely to be like someone else's song. Well, perhaps it is, but not like anyone's in this competition! The barbershop quartet works, especially when delivered with Edric's insufferably perfect pitch. A bit meta, but in this case, the pandering works, and there's a lot of humor. Sure, some of them are in-jokes, but Edric knows his audience. I laughed out loud just once during this song: I started at about :22 seconds into it, and I finished at 2:09. The thing is, instead of making things up out of whole cloth, Edric works a LOT of Lansing into this song along with the humor. I have no doubt at all that Edric had more fun than anyone else writing and recording his number. Who else could've turned a horrible economy and a housing sales slump into sugar-spun entertainment? Well done, Mr. Haleen!
wait WHAT (LBC) - OK, this song is pure entertainment, and like Edric's it manages to be so without sacrificing the real town. As to the relative placement of "LBC" or "Lansing", it's a virtual toss-up. Long Beach is inextricably woven throughout this breezy number. And breezy it is... so much so that if you don't start out by listening closely to the lyrics, you might find yourself saying "wait, WHAT?" and hitting replay to make sure you heard correctly. This song wins not one, but TWO coveted no-prizes from this judge! The first is a Chutzpah Award for working their band name into the song more times than most bands mention the town. The second is the first-ever Insensitivity Award for rudest lyrics disguised as a Sesame Street song. This review has been brought to you by the letters L, B, and C; and ... Wait W H A T.
Gweebol (Darktown) - I don't exactly know what a gweebol is, but I do know it looks a bit like a suction-cup monkey, and it has a gorgeous voice. I love this quirky little waltz, and don't really feel the need to explain a reason beyond the fact that it's fun and I like it. Out of sheer curiosity, I had a lot of fun tracking down Darktown; and there are enough clues in the song to get you there. (That's right, this challenge is not only a travelogue, it's an Internet scavenger hunt!) You may want to take Shaggy and Scooby with you.
Steve Durand (In Paradise With You) - This is a really brave entry, and I think the bravery pays off. Hawaiian music for a Hawaiian town: it seems like a natural, but it still hit me from left field. Steve Durand is getting his own coveted no-prize: The "Finally! An Internet Musician Who Knows What A Ukelele Is For!" Award. Also, I'm going to give you a private peek behind the scenes in the life of Dr. Lindyke. I know a certain young lady who refuses to swim in the ocean because whales have sex in it. Guess which song is going to be played in her presence at every possible opportunity? Go on... guess!
Ryan "Ruff" Smith (Golden Valley Sunday) - I have visions of vintage Dinah Shore in this suburban picture postcard. It's smooth, it's sweet, and I'm old enough that it feels nostalgic and not put-on. Well done, Ruff!
Chris Cogott (Fairfield) - This song about about Fairfield, NJ sounds a bit like Weird Al backed by Rush. This is straight up rock-and-roll, competently done; but I'm struggling to find something really memorable about it. I've listened to it a lot, at different times of day, hoping that maybe it just needs to catch me at the right moment. As a result it's somewhere in the middle. Oh... needs more cowbell.
Rebecca Brickley (Here) - Rebecca, as I listened to this the first time, I was getting madder and madder because it's such a great piece and I couldn't find a shred of hometown in it! I came this close to tossing this down at the bottom of the heap for missing the challenge entirely. And I'd've been so extremely pissed to have had to do that to you when you have it in you to win this competition. So, listening desperately, finally in verse 7, I find a single mention that -- barely -- saved it from the trash heap. Don't ever do that to me again! I had to listen to the song all over again just to enjoy it. And a third time, because I enjoyed the second. It's a beautifully nostalgic piece about a lost relationship... and it would've scored much higher if it better met the challenge. The only reason that it scores this high is that, as a song, it is simply superb.
Austin Criswell (Mount Holly) - Austin has excellent voice: it's just a perfect, clear folk vocal. reminiscent of John Denver. And this is not a bad song at all. The only problem I have with it is that it doesn't tell me anything about Mount Holly other than 'you' are in it, and I'm going there. I wish Austin had given us something of Mount Holly here. What an awesome talent!
Charlie McCarron (Stillwater MN Air) - This humorous little vignette of life on the river is beautifully arranged for piano and recorder. I can smell the stale fish from here. We also get a nice hint at Stillwater's historical roots as a lumber town.
Heather Miller (Fairfield) - This song is very much a bit of homespun Americana. The hook, "Fairfield all the way" could evoke visions of football cheerleaders. Or, depending on the amount of sleep I had last night -- not enough, apparently -- it could suggest the way that zombies prefer their Fairfielders. Or even... cheerleader zombies! You don't get any more American than that! Now, you might not like the Country style; you might think this song is just plain and simple. Remember what I said way up top about the song illustrating the town? When you're talking about plain and simple folk, then a plain and simple song is 100% appropriate. Heather, the main criticism I have here is performance-wise... back off of the mic a little bit and get your voice out of the rafters. Sitting way up there, you can't put any volume or excitement to the lyrics, which is bad news for a cheerleading hook. And since you do have a guitar, don't forget the bottom. Lay a bass track. For some reason, my mind says there should be a jaw harp on this arrangement.
Brian Gray (South Bend Aid) - This is a really fun song, parodying the "Band Aid" songs like "We Are The World". It is, however, greatly fictionalized. Nevertheless, the place names are real. And there's no denying that South Bend is not Saint Louis, so Brian's already got Inverse T. Clown beat on verisimilitude alone. Perhaps more than any other artist here, Brian Gray made me hop on Google and research his home town. Well done, you sneaky sonnuvabitch. Performance-wise, it seems a little timid, it could open up more. I also wish you had some diverse voices, but I know how tough that is to arrange on short notice, and I'm happy to fill them in as I listen.
Inverse T. Clown (The Pinpoint Accurate Telling of the History of Salem, OH) - The title was enough to tell me that The Painted One was going to be in trouble this round. First, the good: this is one of the best vocals I've ever heard come out of ITC's freshly stitched lips. This is delivered with far more force and conviction than the timid stylings of some of his earlier songs. And I like the song, too: it's already on my MP3 player along with "Devastator", and I'm scoring it WAY up for that. BUT... it hangs on to reality (and the challenge) by the most tenuous thread imaginable. *sigh*. I still like it. If you're looking for the history of the Salem of Earth-2, look no farther! But the listeners should really look up the Wikipedia article on Salem, OH to find its connection to this world.
Duality (To the End of the World) - Beautiful work as always from the Joe/Den duo. But I have the same comment here as with many of those that I didn't rank near the top... I wish there were more of the town in it. That is, after all, the topic. This seems to be about aspiring to be somewhere else, and Dundee doesn't seem to have a lot to do with it. Other songs met the challenge more decisively.
Emperor Gum (Cheltenham) - This is one of those songs where my imagination did a lot of work to compensate for the execution. I didn't mind doing that at all, because Graham's given us a lot of Cheltenham in his lyrics with which to work, When he sings, "...the town I love", you know it's true. Best line: "Falling leaves like copper flakes".... nice. Musically and structurally, the song is very simple. It would be nice if there something to break it up and give it more texture than it has. Also, which is unusual in this batch of songs, there is perhaps too much detail; the song is in danger of falling into the "here's a list of stuff in my town" trap. It's a fine line... you want to pick an aspect of the town and emphasize that, without feeling as if you have to say everything there is to say in one song. For example, if it's a friendly place, write about those things that make it friendly, leaving off the rest. This plays more like a tour. As a result it doesn't communicate much emotion to the audience.
The Boffo Yux Dudes (It's My Hometown, Syracuse, Baby!) - It may be that that this is the first non-comedic song I've heard from BYD. There's a lot of local color here, but it doesn't have the impact of some of the higher-ranked entries. I think that my criticism here is the same as with "Cheltenham"... it's mostly a list of stuff. This sort of song sparks fond recollections in the people who lived there, but I'm not sure it really gives those of us who didn't much of an idea of what Syracuse feels like.
Charlie Wolf (I Love LA) - This is a song that could use a little career guidance to find out what it wants to be. Almost everything other than the "I Love LA" lyric points to a song about missing the girl, wanting to get to the girl, to be with her and to see her face. So is it a song about LA or about the girl? With a tweak it could be either... but it needs that tweak.
Danny Blackwell (A Song About Woodsetts) - This is a wistful little hometown song. I think the time signature works better in the chorus than in the verses. Most memorable line: "And we were searching for songs 'tween their thighs". Sure you were, Danny. I think you'd have gotten better results in this recording if you'd recorded the guitar and vocals separately and mixed them. Then you could have controlled that guitar a bit better and still gotten the emphasis you were looking for.
JoAnn Abbott (Not In Copiage) - Very thought provoking and a LOT of her hometown in this. I like the song, and it's a shame Jo couldn't get someone to accompany her, because the song's much better than this rough recording would lead you to believe. I played it several times, and I kept thinking it was a tad too long, but looking at the clock it's not. Accompaniment may fix that, but honestly I think that the lyric toward the end should just be tightened up.
Common Lisp (Leaving Ann Arbor) - OK, do this... go back and listen the spoken portion of this song, and compare it to the rest. It's as if they were written by two completely different people. One is hip and solid and edgy, and the other is lost and looking. Now go back and listen to "Polly Loves the Rain" from Song Fu 6, round 1. DAY-um! Paul... spoken word is your forte. You're GREAT at it. Keep the rap, replace the song.
Russ Rogers (Song For St. Michael) - Runner-up for best title. Sadly, I don't think this is Russ' best. I was a little turned off by the 'Corner Bar' verse. It's a good verse, but it seems out of place in this song. Here we have a theme of "my town's so small..." so instead of expanding on that, we have an entire verse (one of only two!) devoted to this bit of violence. It may be that yep, it's big news. It may be that two verses are indicative of the smallness of the town. But we really need to see that in the lyric; If you're going to have only two verses, make them count.
Swatshots (Level) - I can't understand a single lyric. I don't mean I don't comprehend them... I read as well as the next guy. But I had to read them because they're muddy and unintelligible. What's clear is that you don't like Plainfield. What's not clear is why. "I hate Smallville" is a perfectly good sentiment for this challenge (and I was surprised not to find more of it), but the same criteria apply for hate as for love. Show us why.
David Ritter (Fired) - It's supposed to be a song about your hometown. There are other songs in the round that precariously skirt the challenge, but this one doesn't even try. Mentioning a town name in passing when you write a song about something completely different doesn't cut it. This is a song about getting fired. Which is ironically appropriate. I only wish we could get The Donald to do the honors.
And that's it for this round. I'm not reviewing shadows simply because this job is tough enough as it is, and I expect future rounds to be even harder to judge.
================
OH, ALL RIGHT... THE SHADOWS:
(and would you like cake? Or death?)
Duality (I Just Can't Find A Virgin) - I once wrote an Irish song on which Joe was kind enough to play bodhran, and I was guilty about the accent. I have a song or two that could be done in a Scots style, and I've held off because I've been guilty about the accent. No more guilt. This song releases me. Awww, c'mon. It's a shadow and it's funny, and I laughed.
via Satellite (From Home) - Evanescence Lite. I'm not personally a big fan of styles that break up and disguise the lyrics to the point where they can't be understood, but I can certainly enjoy this tune. It's just as well that it's not really lyric driven, in that the message is mixed there. We're told Kalamazoo is a prison, but not shown why; the city "means nothing", yet it's constantly refered to as "home". This wouldn't have placed near the top of my list, but it would have made a fair showing, and you'd have moved on to the next round, I'm sure. Keep shadowing... I'd like to hear more. Particularly it would be nice to hear one where Kylie's voice is not muddied up in the mix.
Bram Tant (Living In The Countryside) - Bram, I told you you could fit it in (twss). And now we know how to pronounce it. For a song that you didn't think you could write, this would have fared well. And you are the lone exception to a rule... even though this song is fictionalized, I get the feeling that it's not done for mere humor, but to illustrate your feeling about the place itself. Ironically, you tell us more about your relationship with Bachte-Maria-Leerne with the stuff you made up than you would have had you stuck to the facts. This places "Living in the Countryside" well above other fictionalized accounts such as "Salem" and "St. Louis". By "well above" I don't mean "barely above". Good work. Next time sign up and compete.
First, the challenge is paramount. You can write the best song in the world, but if it didn't meet the challenge, then I'm sorry. I mean I'm really sorry; I will well and truly weep as I move you to the bottom of the list. Crashing and burning in style is still crashing and burning; so if you do nothing else, make sure you meet the challenge unambiguously. Also remember that the challenge was given to you for a reason. This is the "Iron Chef" of music competitions. It's not enough to write just a great song; you also have to meet the challenge better than the other challengers.
Second, I see this as a songwriting competition: it's not a battle of the bands. So you've got a pretty clear shot even if your rhythm section is a metronome and your face is on milk cartons printed by Auto-Tune. I have no problem filling in (in my head) entire missing arrangements, so long as your intent is clear. That said, don't be surprised if people who can fully produce a song are also capable of writing kick-ass songs... and obviously, their intent doesn't have to be guessed at. They do have an edge.
Finally, keep in mind that I'm judging the songs. I'm not judging you, or your potential. You may have greatness in you, and may simply be stumped by a specific challenge. Nevertheless, I have to go by the song. In scoring, factors include the challenge, emotional impact, the lyric, the tune, technical factors, and je ne sais quoi. It's not a scientific formula, so I'll be astounded if anyone agrees with all of my choices.
In this particular challenge, you were asked to write a song about your hometown. You should have included the name of the place in the lyrics; and it should have been a place where you have roots, which means to me a definite place. No one's hometown is a fictional place, so in good conscience I have to score real places much higher than imaginary ones, or imaginary versions of real places(*). And for this challenge, I'm giving a lot of credit for songs that allow me to draw a mental picture of your hometown. The more descriptive, the better. I want to know what it feels like. There are so many great entries that I can afford to be picky, and that's where I choose to draw my lines.
* So did I track down these locations? Well... yeah, I did. Not for any rules compliance... we had already concluded that we really couldn't verify what is or isn't your hometown... you could pretty much pick any place you wanted. Take it as a compliment that you folks instilled enough curiosity in at least one judge to go check out the great places you were writing about. I was hoping that this challenge would yield a musical world tour compiled by the most creative minds we could muster. You folks did not disappoint. You have done a fantastic job, and I am not worthy to tune your instruments. Be proud.
Now, on to the reviews...
Governing Dynamics (Stars Over Avalon) - We begin with a coveted no-prize for "Best Title", hands down. Hell, it's a gorgeous title. And the song matches it. Sure, this is a competition, but songwriting isn't all about energy. It's also about creating and communicating a mood, and not every mood is "get up and dance". What I like here is the way Travis has painted this picture in sound using shades of vivid Blues. It's a sleepy, laid-back tune for a sleepy town, and immensely descriptive. I'm also pleased that Travis manages to get through the bridge and instrumental with sufficient variety, yet without shattering the mood by shifting into high energy. This song was the perfect storm for me... I listened at the right time of day and in the right frame of mind to fully appreciate it, and it's carried over to subsequent listenings. This is an artistic piece all around, and I'm diggin' the ebow. The weakest part is Travis' vocals. To me that's a quibble, but I can't help thinking that if Travis Norris and Austin Criswell were ever to join forces they would be formidable indeed. Despite the shaky vocals, I love the song, and I have a soft spot for small towns. You're free to disagree, but I'm giving top marks this round to Governing Dynamics. 28 points. (Dave goes into detail about this song on his blog.)
Zarni DeWet (Where I'm Gonna Go) - Wow, what economy of words! I'm not writing these individual critiques in the order you're going to read them. Elsewhere you'll hear me write about how a song needs 'more of the town', which in many cases means more lyrics devoted to description. Not here. With a few short lines I can see the houses of Durban, and I know why those poor men are rich. Three cities, three verses, and for each, a single line that tells you without a doubt why it's home. The repetition of "That's where I'm gonna go gonna gonna go" gives that assertion a sense of eagerness. This is, without a doubt, the most emotionally powerful song on the entire playlist. I visited three cities in South Africa via Google Streetview thanks to this song. The weak point here is, perhaps ironically, the same. This hometown song, being spread over three cities, doesn't allow Zarni to engage in the depth of description we hear in "Stars Over Avalon". We do, however, hear allusions to a personal journey that, coupled with her strong performance, lands her in second place.
Ominous Ride (San Francisco) - Great hippy groove! I've been to San Francisco and I couldn't find the sun, either. I thought it was just a bad day. The groove alone gets this song extra points, as it evokes the 60's, free love, and the feel of vintage San Francisco. That's before you listen to a single word. Then the lyrics drive home the fact that this song could be about no place else on this Earth. This is how it's done, folks!
Mitchell Adam Johnson (London) - I LOVE THIS! SO SIXTIES! I can just see the mini-skirts in bold geometric print. It's a killer tune, and I could listen to it all day, every day. Here's why this song is not heading this list: you can replace "London" with "Marvin" and do nothing else, and this song still works, even with the offhand references in the bridge. That's a very weak association, making it hard to say that it's a song "about London". If Mitchell had handed us a song that you can't shake the London out of, then he would easily have had my top spot.
Ben Walker (Oxford) - I spent a lot of time in Oxford during the five years I lived in the Midlands. It's a unique city where ancient charm meets modern erudition, and the minds of children play dress-up with adult ideas. Ben has captured it perfectly, right down to the late night pickled eggs. This is a song bound to Oxford and nowhere else. The tango in the bridge had me smiling... a great change of pace. Now the bad: I didn't like the "Cheers" homage. I thought it was entirely unnecessary and distracting. After painting this lovely picture of Oxford, Ben covers it over with Bostonian whitewash. It's like cleansing your palate with peppermint mouthwash between wine tastings. I would unreservedly love this song if that weren't in it.
Ross Durand (From There) - This is a really strong entry. This feels like a movie soundtrack, and Ross performs a neat trick here: although the lyrics are totally descriptive of an idealized Thousand Oaks, as I listen my mind plays out scenes of dusty roads and a lone hitchhiker, travel-weary and dreaming of home. Ross' distinctive voice and style really sell the imagery. This town is only a figurative stone's throw from Long Beach, but the contrast between this entry and and "LBC" couldn't be starker. What a difference 60 miles makes!
Edric Haleen (Lansing Michigan) - I seem to recall that prior to its unveiling, Edric nominated his song as most likely to suck seed. No! Wait! It was most likely to be like someone else's song. Well, perhaps it is, but not like anyone's in this competition! The barbershop quartet works, especially when delivered with Edric's insufferably perfect pitch. A bit meta, but in this case, the pandering works, and there's a lot of humor. Sure, some of them are in-jokes, but Edric knows his audience. I laughed out loud just once during this song: I started at about :22 seconds into it, and I finished at 2:09. The thing is, instead of making things up out of whole cloth, Edric works a LOT of Lansing into this song along with the humor. I have no doubt at all that Edric had more fun than anyone else writing and recording his number. Who else could've turned a horrible economy and a housing sales slump into sugar-spun entertainment? Well done, Mr. Haleen!
wait WHAT (LBC) - OK, this song is pure entertainment, and like Edric's it manages to be so without sacrificing the real town. As to the relative placement of "LBC" or "Lansing", it's a virtual toss-up. Long Beach is inextricably woven throughout this breezy number. And breezy it is... so much so that if you don't start out by listening closely to the lyrics, you might find yourself saying "wait, WHAT?" and hitting replay to make sure you heard correctly. This song wins not one, but TWO coveted no-prizes from this judge! The first is a Chutzpah Award for working their band name into the song more times than most bands mention the town. The second is the first-ever Insensitivity Award for rudest lyrics disguised as a Sesame Street song. This review has been brought to you by the letters L, B, and C; and ... Wait W H A T.
Gweebol (Darktown) - I don't exactly know what a gweebol is, but I do know it looks a bit like a suction-cup monkey, and it has a gorgeous voice. I love this quirky little waltz, and don't really feel the need to explain a reason beyond the fact that it's fun and I like it. Out of sheer curiosity, I had a lot of fun tracking down Darktown; and there are enough clues in the song to get you there. (That's right, this challenge is not only a travelogue, it's an Internet scavenger hunt!) You may want to take Shaggy and Scooby with you.
Steve Durand (In Paradise With You) - This is a really brave entry, and I think the bravery pays off. Hawaiian music for a Hawaiian town: it seems like a natural, but it still hit me from left field. Steve Durand is getting his own coveted no-prize: The "Finally! An Internet Musician Who Knows What A Ukelele Is For!" Award. Also, I'm going to give you a private peek behind the scenes in the life of Dr. Lindyke. I know a certain young lady who refuses to swim in the ocean because whales have sex in it. Guess which song is going to be played in her presence at every possible opportunity? Go on... guess!
Ryan "Ruff" Smith (Golden Valley Sunday) - I have visions of vintage Dinah Shore in this suburban picture postcard. It's smooth, it's sweet, and I'm old enough that it feels nostalgic and not put-on. Well done, Ruff!
Chris Cogott (Fairfield) - This song about about Fairfield, NJ sounds a bit like Weird Al backed by Rush. This is straight up rock-and-roll, competently done; but I'm struggling to find something really memorable about it. I've listened to it a lot, at different times of day, hoping that maybe it just needs to catch me at the right moment. As a result it's somewhere in the middle. Oh... needs more cowbell.
Rebecca Brickley (Here) - Rebecca, as I listened to this the first time, I was getting madder and madder because it's such a great piece and I couldn't find a shred of hometown in it! I came this close to tossing this down at the bottom of the heap for missing the challenge entirely. And I'd've been so extremely pissed to have had to do that to you when you have it in you to win this competition. So, listening desperately, finally in verse 7, I find a single mention that -- barely -- saved it from the trash heap. Don't ever do that to me again! I had to listen to the song all over again just to enjoy it. And a third time, because I enjoyed the second. It's a beautifully nostalgic piece about a lost relationship... and it would've scored much higher if it better met the challenge. The only reason that it scores this high is that, as a song, it is simply superb.
Austin Criswell (Mount Holly) - Austin has excellent voice: it's just a perfect, clear folk vocal. reminiscent of John Denver. And this is not a bad song at all. The only problem I have with it is that it doesn't tell me anything about Mount Holly other than 'you' are in it, and I'm going there. I wish Austin had given us something of Mount Holly here. What an awesome talent!
Charlie McCarron (Stillwater MN Air) - This humorous little vignette of life on the river is beautifully arranged for piano and recorder. I can smell the stale fish from here. We also get a nice hint at Stillwater's historical roots as a lumber town.
Heather Miller (Fairfield) - This song is very much a bit of homespun Americana. The hook, "Fairfield all the way" could evoke visions of football cheerleaders. Or, depending on the amount of sleep I had last night -- not enough, apparently -- it could suggest the way that zombies prefer their Fairfielders. Or even... cheerleader zombies! You don't get any more American than that! Now, you might not like the Country style; you might think this song is just plain and simple. Remember what I said way up top about the song illustrating the town? When you're talking about plain and simple folk, then a plain and simple song is 100% appropriate. Heather, the main criticism I have here is performance-wise... back off of the mic a little bit and get your voice out of the rafters. Sitting way up there, you can't put any volume or excitement to the lyrics, which is bad news for a cheerleading hook. And since you do have a guitar, don't forget the bottom. Lay a bass track. For some reason, my mind says there should be a jaw harp on this arrangement.
Brian Gray (South Bend Aid) - This is a really fun song, parodying the "Band Aid" songs like "We Are The World". It is, however, greatly fictionalized. Nevertheless, the place names are real. And there's no denying that South Bend is not Saint Louis, so Brian's already got Inverse T. Clown beat on verisimilitude alone. Perhaps more than any other artist here, Brian Gray made me hop on Google and research his home town. Well done, you sneaky sonnuvabitch. Performance-wise, it seems a little timid, it could open up more. I also wish you had some diverse voices, but I know how tough that is to arrange on short notice, and I'm happy to fill them in as I listen.
Inverse T. Clown (The Pinpoint Accurate Telling of the History of Salem, OH) - The title was enough to tell me that The Painted One was going to be in trouble this round. First, the good: this is one of the best vocals I've ever heard come out of ITC's freshly stitched lips. This is delivered with far more force and conviction than the timid stylings of some of his earlier songs. And I like the song, too: it's already on my MP3 player along with "Devastator", and I'm scoring it WAY up for that. BUT... it hangs on to reality (and the challenge) by the most tenuous thread imaginable. *sigh*. I still like it. If you're looking for the history of the Salem of Earth-2, look no farther! But the listeners should really look up the Wikipedia article on Salem, OH to find its connection to this world.
Duality (To the End of the World) - Beautiful work as always from the Joe/Den duo. But I have the same comment here as with many of those that I didn't rank near the top... I wish there were more of the town in it. That is, after all, the topic. This seems to be about aspiring to be somewhere else, and Dundee doesn't seem to have a lot to do with it. Other songs met the challenge more decisively.
Emperor Gum (Cheltenham) - This is one of those songs where my imagination did a lot of work to compensate for the execution. I didn't mind doing that at all, because Graham's given us a lot of Cheltenham in his lyrics with which to work, When he sings, "...the town I love", you know it's true. Best line: "Falling leaves like copper flakes".... nice. Musically and structurally, the song is very simple. It would be nice if there something to break it up and give it more texture than it has. Also, which is unusual in this batch of songs, there is perhaps too much detail; the song is in danger of falling into the "here's a list of stuff in my town" trap. It's a fine line... you want to pick an aspect of the town and emphasize that, without feeling as if you have to say everything there is to say in one song. For example, if it's a friendly place, write about those things that make it friendly, leaving off the rest. This plays more like a tour. As a result it doesn't communicate much emotion to the audience.
The Boffo Yux Dudes (It's My Hometown, Syracuse, Baby!) - It may be that that this is the first non-comedic song I've heard from BYD. There's a lot of local color here, but it doesn't have the impact of some of the higher-ranked entries. I think that my criticism here is the same as with "Cheltenham"... it's mostly a list of stuff. This sort of song sparks fond recollections in the people who lived there, but I'm not sure it really gives those of us who didn't much of an idea of what Syracuse feels like.
Charlie Wolf (I Love LA) - This is a song that could use a little career guidance to find out what it wants to be. Almost everything other than the "I Love LA" lyric points to a song about missing the girl, wanting to get to the girl, to be with her and to see her face. So is it a song about LA or about the girl? With a tweak it could be either... but it needs that tweak.
Danny Blackwell (A Song About Woodsetts) - This is a wistful little hometown song. I think the time signature works better in the chorus than in the verses. Most memorable line: "And we were searching for songs 'tween their thighs". Sure you were, Danny. I think you'd have gotten better results in this recording if you'd recorded the guitar and vocals separately and mixed them. Then you could have controlled that guitar a bit better and still gotten the emphasis you were looking for.
JoAnn Abbott (Not In Copiage) - Very thought provoking and a LOT of her hometown in this. I like the song, and it's a shame Jo couldn't get someone to accompany her, because the song's much better than this rough recording would lead you to believe. I played it several times, and I kept thinking it was a tad too long, but looking at the clock it's not. Accompaniment may fix that, but honestly I think that the lyric toward the end should just be tightened up.
Common Lisp (Leaving Ann Arbor) - OK, do this... go back and listen the spoken portion of this song, and compare it to the rest. It's as if they were written by two completely different people. One is hip and solid and edgy, and the other is lost and looking. Now go back and listen to "Polly Loves the Rain" from Song Fu 6, round 1. DAY-um! Paul... spoken word is your forte. You're GREAT at it. Keep the rap, replace the song.
Russ Rogers (Song For St. Michael) - Runner-up for best title. Sadly, I don't think this is Russ' best. I was a little turned off by the 'Corner Bar' verse. It's a good verse, but it seems out of place in this song. Here we have a theme of "my town's so small..." so instead of expanding on that, we have an entire verse (one of only two!) devoted to this bit of violence. It may be that yep, it's big news. It may be that two verses are indicative of the smallness of the town. But we really need to see that in the lyric; If you're going to have only two verses, make them count.
Swatshots (Level) - I can't understand a single lyric. I don't mean I don't comprehend them... I read as well as the next guy. But I had to read them because they're muddy and unintelligible. What's clear is that you don't like Plainfield. What's not clear is why. "I hate Smallville" is a perfectly good sentiment for this challenge (and I was surprised not to find more of it), but the same criteria apply for hate as for love. Show us why.
David Ritter (Fired) - It's supposed to be a song about your hometown. There are other songs in the round that precariously skirt the challenge, but this one doesn't even try. Mentioning a town name in passing when you write a song about something completely different doesn't cut it. This is a song about getting fired. Which is ironically appropriate. I only wish we could get The Donald to do the honors.
And that's it for this round. I'm not reviewing shadows simply because this job is tough enough as it is, and I expect future rounds to be even harder to judge.
================
OH, ALL RIGHT... THE SHADOWS:
(and would you like cake? Or death?)
Duality (I Just Can't Find A Virgin) - I once wrote an Irish song on which Joe was kind enough to play bodhran, and I was guilty about the accent. I have a song or two that could be done in a Scots style, and I've held off because I've been guilty about the accent. No more guilt. This song releases me. Awww, c'mon. It's a shadow and it's funny, and I laughed.
via Satellite (From Home) - Evanescence Lite. I'm not personally a big fan of styles that break up and disguise the lyrics to the point where they can't be understood, but I can certainly enjoy this tune. It's just as well that it's not really lyric driven, in that the message is mixed there. We're told Kalamazoo is a prison, but not shown why; the city "means nothing", yet it's constantly refered to as "home". This wouldn't have placed near the top of my list, but it would have made a fair showing, and you'd have moved on to the next round, I'm sure. Keep shadowing... I'd like to hear more. Particularly it would be nice to hear one where Kylie's voice is not muddied up in the mix.
Bram Tant (Living In The Countryside) - Bram, I told you you could fit it in (twss). And now we know how to pronounce it. For a song that you didn't think you could write, this would have fared well. And you are the lone exception to a rule... even though this song is fictionalized, I get the feeling that it's not done for mere humor, but to illustrate your feeling about the place itself. Ironically, you tell us more about your relationship with Bachte-Maria-Leerne with the stuff you made up than you would have had you stuck to the facts. This places "Living in the Countryside" well above other fictionalized accounts such as "Salem" and "St. Louis". By "well above" I don't mean "barely above". Good work. Next time sign up and compete.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
SpinTunes 2: Round 1 Songs
You can find the album on BandCamp by clicking the image below:
(Album cover by JoAnn Abbott)
You can vote for your favorite songs with the poll in the right sidebar. -->
(Popular vote stays open til 8PM on the 16th.)
Judges need to have their reviews sent to me by October 16th 10PM. I plan on posting the reviews/rankings/eliminations by 11PM...hopefully. :p
If all goes as planned...October 17th 1AM the round 2 challenge will be announced.
Videos:
If anyone wants to make a video for their song, I'll include it here:
This One's For Jane by Russ Rogers (sequel to: Sweet Jane, by Lou Reed/Velvet Underground)
This was finished in time for this round, but not recorded in time. It's not yet on the album.
A Song About Woodsetts by Danny Blackwell
LBC by wait WHAT!
Leaving Ann Arbor by Common Lisp
Fired by David Ritter
Reviews & Links Of Interest For This Round:
- Yall should thank your judge Dr. Lindyke for making the new banner.
- One of the judges from SpinTunes #1 (Niveous) decided to predict the winner of the contest before it even started. Check it out on his blog AudioShards.
- Niveous also posted a review of this round.
- Common Lisp posted a review of the round.
- Emperor Gum posted a song bio & review of the round.
- Brian Gray posted a Song Bio for his entry.
- Ross Durand posted alternate versions of his song, along with a song bio, over on his website.
- Common Lisp posted a Song Bio for his entry.
- Heather Miller posted a Song Bio for her entry.
- Governing Dynamics posted a Song Bio for his entry.
- Dr. Lindyke posted a little more information about his views on reviewing songs.
- Tom of "The Boffo Yux Dudes" got the contest a shout out.
You can vote for your favorite songs with the poll in the right sidebar. -->
(Popular vote stays open til 8PM on the 16th.)
Judges need to have their reviews sent to me by October 16th 10PM. I plan on posting the reviews/rankings/eliminations by 11PM...hopefully. :p
If all goes as planned...October 17th 1AM the round 2 challenge will be announced.
Videos:
If anyone wants to make a video for their song, I'll include it here:
This One's For Jane by Russ Rogers (sequel to: Sweet Jane, by Lou Reed/Velvet Underground)
This was finished in time for this round, but not recorded in time. It's not yet on the album.
A Song About Woodsetts by Danny Blackwell
LBC by wait WHAT!
Leaving Ann Arbor by Common Lisp
Fired by David Ritter
Reviews & Links Of Interest For This Round:
- Yall should thank your judge Dr. Lindyke for making the new banner.
- One of the judges from SpinTunes #1 (Niveous) decided to predict the winner of the contest before it even started. Check it out on his blog AudioShards.
- Niveous also posted a review of this round.
- Common Lisp posted a review of the round.
- Emperor Gum posted a song bio & review of the round.
- Brian Gray posted a Song Bio for his entry.
- Ross Durand posted alternate versions of his song, along with a song bio, over on his website.
- Common Lisp posted a Song Bio for his entry.
- Heather Miller posted a Song Bio for her entry.
- Governing Dynamics posted a Song Bio for his entry.
- Dr. Lindyke posted a little more information about his views on reviewing songs.
- Tom of "The Boffo Yux Dudes" got the contest a shout out.
Monday, October 11, 2010
Listening Party & Deadline News
35 individuals or bands entered SpinTunes #2, and 28 of them managed to enter a round 1 song before the deadline. If you remember there were 11 deadline victims in round 1 of SpinTunes #1, so this is an improvement. So far there have been 2 shadow songs turned in as well, and HOPEFULLY we get a few more shadows before the listening party.
Eliminations:
With 28 total entries, eliminations will go as followed:
Round 1: 8 eliminations
Round 2: 8 eliminations
Round 3: 8 eliminations
That will leave 4 bands in the final round.
Listening Party:
It will be hosted by me at the following address: http://www.ustream.tv/channel/spintunes
It will officially start at 8PM (EDT) TODAY. I will probably start broadcasting a little early just to make sure everything is set up & ready, but won't start the SpinTunes songs until 8PM. All songs will be available for FREE listen & download right after the LP.
Minor Change:
To avoid confusion I'm going to start using EDT instead of EST when I set deadlines. If you're ever confused about when a deadline ends, I'll have a countdown timer linked to above...go by that. The latest bit of confusion was 1% my fault, but 99% Heather's...I'll man up & take full responsibility for that 1%. I'll make the needed edits to previous blogs asap. Feel free to point out anything I missed.
Eliminations:
With 28 total entries, eliminations will go as followed:
Round 1: 8 eliminations
Round 2: 8 eliminations
Round 3: 8 eliminations
That will leave 4 bands in the final round.
Listening Party:
It will be hosted by me at the following address: http://www.ustream.tv/channel/spintunes
It will officially start at 8PM (EDT) TODAY. I will probably start broadcasting a little early just to make sure everything is set up & ready, but won't start the SpinTunes songs until 8PM. All songs will be available for FREE listen & download right after the LP.
Minor Change:
To avoid confusion I'm going to start using EDT instead of EST when I set deadlines. If you're ever confused about when a deadline ends, I'll have a countdown timer linked to above...go by that. The latest bit of confusion was 1% my fault, but 99% Heather's...I'll man up & take full responsibility for that 1%. I'll make the needed edits to previous blogs asap. Feel free to point out anything I missed.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)